Why can't elephants use computers?
Because they're scared of the mouse.
A good workman doesn't blame his fools
\*tools.
Stupid keyboard.
What happens when you cross a cell phone with a skunk?
You get stinky service!
Hardcore programmers will agree that neither of them would use AC because they all prefer to open windows.
Why did the computer squeak? Because someone stepped on its mouse!
Interesting that illegally copying on computers is known as piracy.
I suppose you CTRL C
My sister's laptop is so sassy and fun, it loves to play disc-o music.
How do you type the word "Royalty" on a keyboard?
You start with the higher R key.
Did you hear about the computer virus that was programmed by a cat?
It's considered meowware!
How many wipes does it take to clean a keyboard?
qwsedrftgyhujikolpawesdrtfgyhujikloaszxdcrfvgtbhnjmk,lazsxdcfvgsedtfrgyftg67y78u87u8uii9op[;'';;'/;l/l;.l.k,lkmjkmertyudfghjk12q21q2qw3qwe3we4r45rt6ygerdgfvbwedfcv qwedfscv
Today my "O" button on my keyboard stopped working.
Maybe it was a sign I should've stopped o-ppressing the keyboard.
Wel'l Wel'l Wel'l - if it isn't autocorrect.
Today I Learned I should NOT have my password be the name of my cat.
I then turned to my cat and said, "Well, wJ:cg/v&A;6BTt, I guess it's back to the drawing board."
The shark and the computer are so alike. They both have and use their megabytes.
He couldn't get over his dead wife, so he got a new computer
Now he can processor.
I can relate to my computer so much. Even I go to sleep after 25mins of inactivity.
Q. Where do computers keep their money?
A. In a data bank.
I had no one to help me when my computer and phone mutinied
I was left to my own devices.
I love complimentary WiFi.
It makes me feel good about myself.
I've got no home, I haven't got control, and I can't see any escape.
I should get a new keyboard.
My doctor must think I have a bad hard drive
He said he needed to C:
Where are dead computer hackers buried?
In decrypt.
You might be able to use a smuggled cell phone in prison.
You just have to have cell coverage.
What do computers do on a beach vacation?
Surf the net.
I'm not like other keyboards...
I'm qwerty
Q. What's a computer geek's favourite snack?
A. Microchips.
Did you hear about the new WiFi connected chef's knife?
It's cutting-edge technology.
Why did the hobbit set his cell phone to vibrate?
He was afraid the ring would give him away.
What was Hitler's favorite computer game?
Mein Kraft.
The oldest computer was an apple given to Adam and Eve back in paradise lost, but it came with very limited memory of just 1 byte. And then everything crashed.
What key on the keyboard is truly out of this world?
The spacebar.
I heard that starting next year, keyboards will no longer be sold with italics...
But it was a bold-faced lie.
My computer wants to build a snowman.
It's frozen.
Why does Mr. Potato need a cell phone? Incase Mr. Onion Rings.
What kind of phone does a burglar use?
A no-key-a.
I joined a support group for former computer hackers.
Anonymous Anonymous.
Q. What did the computer say to the cookie?
A. "Can I have your chocolate chip?"
I didn't know WiFi stood for Wireless Fidelity.
I guess I just didn't get the connection.
What do you do if you spill maple syrup all over your keyboard?
Just turn off sticky keys.
Free Wifi!
Why? Was Mr. Wifi wrongfully accused or something?
My cell phone got drunk.
It took too many screenshots.
My wireless keyboard isn't working
I guess I need to re-pair it.
Why don't birds make cell phone calls? They might accidentally wing the wrong number.
You didn't hear the joke about cell phones?
Probably because it had a bad reception.
What is a tiny cell phone called? A microphone.
Why did the keyboard not get any sleep?...
Because it has two shifts.
How do you come up with a secure password to protect yourself against hackers?
Just make it the last 10 digits of pi.
My kid asked why I named our WiFi "ship"?
But that's how everything syncs.
What do you call a loud conversation? A megaphone.
I want to tell you one more painful phone pun but I decided it's uncalled for.