Why is it so hard to contact a pirate? He leaves his phone off the hooks.
What is it called when an IT person gets surgery on their fingers?
Tech knuckle support.
How do trees get on a computer?
They just log in.
I left my laptop outside on the picnic table, and when I came back, the keyboard was covered in ants...
...It took a while to herd them together but I finally got them all under control.
My computer was running pretty hot
Until I downloaded some fan art, and now it's working better.
I got a new cell phone for my wife...
Pretty awesome trade if you ask me!
My computer's favorite singer is A Dell.
Why do you need a password to make a camp fire?
So you can log in.
I phoned OK magazine the other day. They answered and said "Hello?", so I said "Sorry, wrong number," and hung up.
I had no one to help me when my computer and phone mutinied
I was left to my own devices.
Hardcore programmers will agree that neither of them would use AC because they all prefer to open windows.
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
Why did the computer spy get fired?
She couldn't hack it.
I asked the bartender for the WiFi password but he told me to buy a drink first. So I ordered a Moscow Mule and asked him again. He handed me a card with the password. It said:
"Buy a drink first" ... no spaces, all lowercase."
What do you get when you cross a computer with an elephant? Lots of memory!
I hate hard drives...
...they byte
'what's the Wifi password?'
'Its for security'
'Haha, yes, I know that. But what's the password?'.
'No, it's 'forsecurity'. All one word, lower case.'.
Why did a pirate leave the boat to get his forgotten cell phone? Booty calls.
Up until now, I always thought that all the cool mice would get together and live in my mousepad. Now when I know the truth, I feel quite broken.
I'm not like other keyboards...
I'm qwerty
Q. How does a tree get on the computer?
A. It logs on!
Just received Areal Flood Advisory notification on my phone
I should hope it's a real one, the fake ones are just annoying.
I changed my password to "incorrect". So whenever I forget what it is the computer will say "Your password is incorrect".
My brother, who is an IT guy, got surgery done on his fingers. Now he can truly be called a tech-knuckle support guy.
You might be able to use a smuggled cell phone in prison.
You just have to have cell coverage.
What is a computer's favorite animal?
A RAM.
I asked the librarian for the new book on erectile dysfunction.
She typed on her keyboard and said "It's not coming up!"
I said "Yeah, that's the one!!"
Q. What's a computer geek's favourite snack?
A. Microchips.
Today I Learned I should NOT have my password be the name of my cat.
I then turned to my cat and said, "Well, wJ:cg/v&A;6BTt, I guess it's back to the drawing board."
A few punny Wifi names you can use:
Wi-Fight the Inevitable
Chance the Router
The LAN Before Time
Silence of the LAN
I Believe Wi Can Fi
The Password is...
Click Here to Download
Get off my LAN
Router? I Hardly Knew Her
Definitely Not Wifi
Why are boy keyboards scared of girl keyboards?
They don't want to get qwerties.
My kid asked why I named our WiFi "ship"?
But that's how everything syncs.
German Wi-Fi is the WURST.
My wife and I got married under a cell phone tower.
The ceremony wasn't great, but the reception was perfect.
Why did the PowerPoint presentation cross the road?
To get to the other slide.
Today my "O" button on my keyboard stopped working.
Maybe it was a sign I should've stopped o-ppressing the keyboard.
I left my job at the keyboard factory today. To be honest, I had been looking for an Escape for a while.
What do you call a loud conversation? A megaphone.
Why did the computer crash?
It had a bad driver!
I took all the punctuation marks off of the judge's keyboard.
I expect a long sentence.
I was waiting at the hotel's lobby when the WiFi was disconnecting from time to time.
I really hated that reception.
My computer became self aware and asked for a snack.
I replied, "Sorry I'm fresh out of computer chips."
I now pronounce you husband and wifi
You may kiss the bride goodbye.
Playing the keyboard is...
my type of music.
Why is the 7 key on the keyboard so afraid?
Because the & is near
I named my phone "The Titanic" because it's always syncing.
My mobile phone has a tuneless ring tone. It's chordless.
What did the WiFi router say when it was unplugged?
"Tell my wifi love her
Apparently Dracula sets up a password for every website so he can click on Your Account.
Q. What is a popular search engine for ghosts?
A. GHOULgle!
Go to BabaMail
