What did the thrifty man say when he got his phone bill? "Who says talk is cheap?"
Two days ago, I named my Wifi to "Hack it if you can".
Yesterday it was changed to "Challenge accepted".
What's the tastiest part of a floppy disk?
The cookie!
The oldest computer was an apple given to Adam and Eve back in paradise lost, but it came with very limited memory of just 1 byte. And then everything crashed.
How did the mobile phone propose to his girlfriend?
He gave her a ring
Since getting sober, I decided to go with the cheapest cell phone provider I can find!
Way fewer bars!!!
Got fired from my job at the keyboard factory. I couldn't keep the space clean.
Someone vandalized my keyboard leaving only 1 button.
Surprisingly, the police were more thorough in the investigation than I expected. They even asked to see my colon.
Was going to change my password to MilkyTea but apparently that's too weak.
So I was in the library when this cute girl came up and asked to borrow my external hard drive
It was at this point I realized she wanted the (D:)
I got a asked to leave karaoke night for singing "Danger Zone" seven times in a row. I had exceeded the allowed number of Loggins attempts.
My wireless keyboard isn't working
I guess I need to re-pair it.
I hate hard drives...
...they byte
I fell asleep on my phone the other day. It downloaded a nap.
I was waiting at the hotel's lobby when the WiFi was disconnecting from time to time.
I really hated that reception.
The FBI are raiding an alleged spy's apartment when they discover a hard drive labeled "KGB".
One of the agents holds it up with a look of confusion and says, "Why wouldn't he just write 1 TB?"
What is a computer's favorite animal?
A RAM.
While I was driving, I saw another person driving while talking on his cell phone.
I got so mad, I threw my beer at him.
Why was the hard drive scared of the large file?
Because it was a terror-byte.
IF YOU GUYS SEE A LINK ON FACEBOOK THAT SAYS "GET A MILLION DOLLARS FOR FREE" DON'T CLICK ON IT.
IT IS A VIRUS THAT PUTS YOUR PHONE'S KEYBOARD ON CAPS LOCK.
My brother, who is an IT guy, got surgery done on his fingers. Now he can truly be called a tech-knuckle support guy.
He couldn't get over his dead wife, so he got a new computer
Now he can processor.
Why is the 7 key on the keyboard so afraid?
Because the & is near
In an attempt to deter computer hackers I've changed all my passwords to 'Brazil Nut'
That will be a hard one to crack.
My partner got mad when she found so much spam on my computer.
She said, "Food belongs on a plate!"
If they could prove cell phones give deadly radiation
You could say to people you don't like "cant talk right now, you're giving me cancer".
Don't use the word "EGG" for your password...
It's very easily cracked.
Why do microwaves always mess up WiFi...
...when every one I've tried creates hotspots?
I want to tell you one more painful phone pun but I decided it's uncalled for.
Which hard drive is always the happiest?
Disk C:
Why didn't the cell phone wear his glasses? He lost his contacts.
Wel'l Wel'l Wel'l - if it isn't autocorrect.
How many wipes does it take to clean a keyboard?
qwsedrftgyhujikolpawesdrtfgyhujikloaszxdcrfvgtbhnjmk,lazsxdcfvgsedtfrgyftg67y78u87u8uii9op[;'';;'/;l/l;.l.k,lkmjkmertyudfghjk12q21q2qw3qwe3we4r45rt6ygerdgfvbwedfcv qwedfscv
What's the sketchiest button combo on a computer keyboard?
Shift + T
Up until now, I always thought that all the cool mice would get together and live in my mousepad. Now when I know the truth, I feel quite broken.
How does a pirate communicate? With his aye phone.
You didn't hear the joke about cell phones?
Probably because it had a bad reception.
It's okay password...
...I'm insecure too...
I can relate to my computer so much. Even I go to sleep after 25mins of inactivity.
Why did the spider get on the computer?
To check his website.
What do you call a gushing keyboard?
sqwerty
Why did the telecommuter lose his job? He had to many hang ups.
My computer wants to build a snowman.
It's frozen.
How come an owl turns his cell phone off at night? So he doesn't get any hooty calls.
Q. What's a computer geek's favourite snack?
A. Microchips.
What do computers do on a beach vacation?
Surf the net.
Why do computers make such bad boxers?
Their bark is worse than their byte.
Dear keyboard manufacturers, I'm writing to request a redesign so that g and t wouldn't be right next to each other. Retards
I wanted to do some research on organs in biology, but I had no WiFi and couldn't find the information I wanted.
I wound up using cellular.
Why did the person throw their computer cabinet in the air?
They wanted to store it in the cloud.
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