Scientists have just discovered a fossilized Dinosaur fart...
They say it’s a blast from the past!
Why was the dung beetle mad at the store clerk?
Because the clerk sold him shampoo.
What do you call coffee made from poo?
Crappuccino.
What do you get when you fart on your wallet?
Gas Money.
A dung beetle spent an entire day rolling a ball of dung up a hill, only to have it fall down to the other side...
Needless to say, he lost his sh*t.
After letting elephant dung dry in the sun, it's nearly indestructible.
In fact, I'd say it's pretty heavy doody.
What do you call someone who acts like a piece of fish poop?
A bassturd.
If you poop in your sleep...
You have sleep crapnea.
If you take a dump on a stump...
Does that make it a toilet tree?
What did the poop shoveler say when he quit his job?
"I'm dung with this sh*t!"
Why shouldn’t you fart on elevators?
It’s wrong on so many levels.
My farts don’t smell, they don’t have noses.
Never fart in an apple store
They don't have windows.
Why didn’t the teacher want to fart in front of anyone?
He was a private tootor.
Turns out our washing machine DOES have a “baby poop” setting.
It’s called “Heavy Doody”
I’ve been working on my poop art recently...
It’s pretty sh**.
You wanna know how I remember every poop I take?
I keep a log.
What do you call a small turd?
A dumpling.
People who pretends to never go taking a dump are full of sh**.
What do you call a cop standing on dog poo?
Officer on doody!
Why did the baker go to the toilet?
Because he kneaded a poo.
Do people have strange scents of humor if they laugh at their own farts?
What makes it okay for bats to just poop wherever they want?
For a bat, every room is the batroom.
How do people take a dump when, well, nobody gives a s**t?
What do you call a person who starts their own cow poop business?
An entre-manure.
I was walking down the road and slipped on some dog poo. Someone came up behind me and slipped as well. Trying to sympathize, I said "I just did that!"
They slapped me and said "use the toilet next time"
I was walking along when I saw a pile of dog sh** on the side of the street, a little further on I saw an identical one.
That was a crazy deja poo.
Dung Beetles know how to keep their sh** together.
I found a side job collecting dog poo from people's yards.
It's not much, but business is picking up.
what's the best day of the week to poop?
saTURDay.
A man walks into a zoo, there was only one animal in the zoo.
It was a Shitzu.
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