“Bah-Hum-Pug.”
Time to spruce things up.
Best in snow.
I ordered the wrong kind of flowers online for Valentines Day.
Oops e-daisies.
I'm snow bored.
I’m not lion when I say you’re my mane.
It’s snow joke.
Gold riddance.
Believe in your elf.
From my head tomatoes, I love you bunches.
Irish you luck.
Happy Valentine's Day!
I hope your day starts off with a bang!
"Happy Easter to all my peeps."
I made Chinese for Easter dinner
If I had made Japanese it would have been Eastest Dinner.
Don’t go bacon my heart.
This year for Valentine's day I got my wife the ace of hearts and packets of corn flour, rice flour and self raising flour
She wasn't happy. Apparently it wasn't what she meant when she said she just wanted a card and flowers.
"Have an eggs-tra special Easter day."
How does the Easter Bunny stay fit?
Egg ercise.
“Santa’s beard is so long because he’s bad at shaving. Why do you think they call him Saint Nick?”
I went to an Easter party as a Jesus cosplayer
I told them I was a crossplayer.
Are you a defibrillator? Because you are sending shocks to my heart.
I loaf you.
"Beat it." — Michael Jackson, "Beat It"
Cutest clover in the patch.
“I love you from head to mistletoe.”
I just want to say, “I love brew.”
Just brew it!
Are you a locksmith? Because you have the key to my heart.
I’m fondue you.
What do you call a fake Irish stone? A shamrock.
What do you call a reindeer ghost? A cari-boo!
Shake your shamrocks.
I’m a clover, not a fighter.
How does Santa capture photos? With his North Pole-oroid.
Thank you for making our relationship sweet rather than a rocky road.
Are you a keyboard? Because you are just my type.
I would talk about Valentine’s Day
But it looks like I missed my date.
You’re brew-tiful!
I can heartly wait to see you.
What do you call Santa's helpers? Subordinate clauses.
I think I found my perfect match
Life is brew-tiful!
I asked the older woman at work what she is doing for Valentine’s Day and she said that she was taking her husband to the Cardiologist. The heart wants what the heart wants.
What do you call a kid who doesn’t believe in Santa?
A rebel without a Claus!
I only have ice for you.
I sulfur when you argon.
I’m going green, if you know what I mean.
We have great chemis-tree.
What did Santa name his dog? Santa Paws!
Easter and April Fools fall on the same day this year...
You could say it only happens once in a blue moon.
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