Did you hear about the crook who was stealing guitars from classic rock stars?
He was just arrested for Petty theft.
What did Prince leave on the neck of his guitar?
Finger prince.
I tried to play a bass guitar once.
It didn't make much sound, and it slipped out of my hands and swam away.
Why can't Woody play his guitar?
He doesn't know where his Pixar.
Egyptians claimed to have invented the guitar,
But they were such lyres.
A bloke came up to me and said im going to attack you with the neck of my guitar.
I said to him, "is that a Fret"?
What chord does jesus play on guitar?
Gsus
What kind of cheese is really good at guitar?
Shreddar.
A woman is on trial for beating her significant other with a guitar. “First offender?” the judge asked.
“No” she replied. “First a Gibson , then a Fender”.
After playing guitar for years I thought I could learn to play the piano.
But it's not an easy instrument to pick up.
Why can't guitars have fun with friends with benefits?
Because without strings attached they just can't play...
What's the difference between a guitar and a fish?
You can tune a guitar but you can't "tuna" fish!
What did the upright bass say to the nervous guitar?
“You’re too high strung, don’t fret.”
I really like guitars
They just strike a chord with me.
The fisherman was playing his out-of-tune guitar.
Luckily he caught a Tuna
What do you call a guitar used to play pool?
A cue stick.
Ringo, John snd George walked into an electric guitar shop...
They were less Paul.
What happened when the guitars got in a fight?
They got in treble.
My priest fired me from playing guitar with the choir.
Apparently it’s blasphemous to play a Gsus2 chord.
What do you call a distilled botanical that likes to play the guitar??
Ginny Hendrix
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