Whilst holidaying in France I saw a group of mushrooms performing Queen covers.
I said 'You're brilliant, what's the band called?'
They replied 'We are the Champignons."
I love a good shindig. Just call me Napoleon Bonapart-y.
What’s Austrian and took over France?
Croissants.
Have you heard of the tallest tower in France?
It’s a real Eiffel.
I can’t believe you have the de Gaulle to say that to my face.
Why is the French Prime Minister never seen in the morning?
Becasue he is pm not am!
What did the father ant said to his son when they moved to France from America?
Son, we are now Europeants!
What are stepfathers called in France?
Faux pas.
The 70s/80s aesthetic has recently become pretty popular in France.
They say it has a certain Gen X sais quoi.
It’s time to say Versailles to France.
French history is nothing to Lafayette at.
What did France, Great Britain, and their allies say after The Great War?
World War Won.
French people give me the crepes.
France is beautiful in every Cezanne.
I always feel like a winner in France, which is great because I hate Toulouse.
French guy goes into a bar with a frog on his head
The bartender asks “where’d you get that?” And the frog says “in France. There’s loads of them.”
Someone from Southern France sent me an MS Word file with 200 pages.
It's a Languedoc.
It's only quarantine if it comes from the quarantine region of France;
otherwise, it's just sparkling isolation.
What happens when you go to the bathroom in France?
European!
Another cheese factory in France exploded...
I Camembert to hear this joke again!
I tripped in France.
Eiffel over.
Are these pants too tight in the Balzac?
Living in france must be hard
I mean, 100 dollars is only a cent.
Everyone knows the Italians invented pizza but few know that it was perfected by French rebels in nazi occupied France during WWII.
It was the pizza de resistance.
Why should you never eat the fish in France?
Because it's poisson.
From up here, I Cannes see the whole French Riviera!
What is a female "Douchebag" in France called??
A douche-baguette.
France – it’s just a oui bit different!
There’s so much to do here so I’m never Bordeaux-ed.
I read Reims of info before I got here, but nothing can prepare you for how beautiful this place is.
It’s a beautiful Degas!
Did you hear of the new disease going through France?
I've heard it was a Paris-ite.
I hate to Gauguin, but I have to catch my flight.
Can a fencing champion born in France, but raised in the U.S. represent either country in the olympics?
Yes. Because they have duel citizenship.
What is the most popular flower in France?
Croissanthemums.
Don’t come to France without any Monet.
When in France, I have Nantes-thing to complain about.
What does the Tour de France and Amsterdam have in common?
They both have a bunch of people on drugs riding around on bikes.
What's in the middle of Paris?
R.
If you were born and raised in France, what does that make you?
French bred.
Why can I not make jokes about the recent attacks in France?
Because jokes are all about execution.
Don’t make such a Dreyfus about it.
So you live in the seventh most populous city in France?
Must be Nice.
French fries aren’t cooked in France
They’re cooked in greece.
What’s the capital of France?
The F.
We Rodin a taxi around the city after dark.
I used to be a personal driver in France
But now I have nothing to chauffeur it.
French, French Revolution
German tourist visits France.
Guy at the Airport: "Nationality?"
German Dude: "German".
Airport Guy: "Occupation?"
German Dude: "Nein, nein, Only Vacation".
I’m in love with France, and I ain’t Lyon.
Go to BabaMail
