An ancient Greek walks into his tailor’s shop with a pair of torn pants.
‘’Euripides’’ says the tailor. ‘’Yeah, Eumenides?’’ replies the man.
Did you know that the Greek god Chronos was in the Mafia?
He was the Don of Time itself!
If you were born and raised in France, what does that make you?
French bred.
I asked my Italian grandfather if the rougher parts of Italy were called the spaghetto.
His look was pasty.
What did France, Great Britain, and their allies say after The Great War?
World War Won.
What do you call a rental car in Spain?
A Barceloaner.
A few years ago, I had a job translating pre-Classical Greek literature into Braille.
It feels like ancient history.
What do you call the Greek God of Mexican chickens?
Apollo
I asked my Spanish girlfriend to make a to-do list
so she wrote down everything.
Genoa bout the bridge collapse in Italy?
Ah well, we won't go over it then.
Historians have discovered a new Greek God who didn’t excel at anything.
His name was mediocretese.
What sound does a Greek cow make?
"μ"
It’s time to say Versailles to France.
What does the Tour de France and Amsterdam have in common?
They both have a bunch of people on drugs riding around on bikes.
French, French Revolution
How do cats say goodbye in Italy?
Miao.
German tourist visits France.
Guy at the Airport: "Nationality?"
German Dude: "German".
Airport Guy: "Occupation?"
German Dude: "Nein, nein, Only Vacation".
Can I go to France this year? Of Corsican!
The Leaning Tower of Pisa is in Italy
So it’s italicized!
In Greek Mythology, Chiron was not only half man and half horse, he was also a doctor of medicine
That made him the centaur for disease control.
What Beatles song charted highest in Italy?
Penne Lane.
Vasco de Balboa told the Queen of Spain, “I discovered a large body of water on my journey.”
She said, “Could you be a little more pacific?”
What is a female "Douchebag" in France called??
A douche-baguette.
What does a frog in Paris eat?
French Flies.
I hate to Gauguin, but I have to catch my flight.
What do France and a pigeon have in common?
Every 5 minutes, there is a coo.
What are stepfathers called in France?
Faux pas.
Don’t come to France without any Monet.
"There's a woman trapped under a motorway bridge in Italy."
"Genoa?"
"I'm not sure, I can't see her face."
What do you call four Spanish guys in a capsized boat?
Quatro sinko.
Son: "Dad, why'd you name me Odysseus? He's from greek mythology."
Dad: "Well son, you broke through the trojan wall."
What do you call someone from Spain who lives near the Portuguese border?
Span-ish.
I'm a supervillain from Italy, I have the power to infect people with deadly diseases.
It’s-a-me, Malario.
What do you call a sneezing big foot in Spanish?
Achoopacabra.
The 70s/80s aesthetic has recently become pretty popular in France.
They say it has a certain Gen X sais quoi.
Did you hear that cats have carried out a Coup in Barcelona and declared independence from Spain?
They're calling themselves the Republic of Catalo-nya.
What language do they speak in Italy
Times New Roman.
What do pups eat in Italy?
Pawsta.
What did the Spanish fireman call his two sons?
José and Hose-B.
When I went to highschool in Italy my classmates were one year older than me.
I Skipped pasta grade.
What did Sophocles call his dating service in Ancient Greece?
Oedipal Arrangements.
French guy goes into a bar with a frog on his head
The bartender asks “where’d you get that?” And the frog says “in France. There’s loads of them.”
Brother: "My friend John is in Greece studying abroad."
My Dad: "What's her name?"
I've finally worked out why Spain is so good at football
Nobody expects the Spanish in position.
What did the father ant said to his son when they moved to France from America?
Son, we are now Europeants!
Where do recluses live in Spain?
Barceloner.
If you don’t have a lot of figurines from Ancient Greek mythology, I can give you a mini tour.
What does a Greek machine need to work?
Greece.
My local Italian restaurant is moving to Italy
They are moving to greener pasta.
What speech did Abraham Lincoln give when he went to Italy?
The Spaghetties-burg Address.
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