What do cars have on toast.
Butter and traffic jam.
What do you call a big queue of trucks, making cheesy one-liners? A pick-up line.
We all have a submarine in our heads but we're not supposed to think about it. It's all sub-conscious.
What the motto of a Boy Scout who got a badge for fixing a bicycle horn?
Beep Repaired!
BREAKING NEWS: Vietnam accidentally sank its own submarine killing all 350 on board
Whoops, wrong sub.
My sister bet me that I couldn’t make a car out of spaghetti
You should have seen her face as I drove Pasta
What happened when the cargo ship full of books sank?
It caused a title wave!
Why did the tricycle not hang out with the bicycles?
It felt like a third wheel
My kid’s toy submarine was having trouble staying under water...
I hope this will not surface again
What is a car’s preferred mobile phone brand?
No-Kia.
What superhero takes public transportation to get around? Bus Lightyear.
My trucker friend was super excited about his new house. I asked him why, and he told me it had a really long haul way.
What’s the difference between a school bus driver and a winter cold? One knows all the stops, and the other stops the nose.
A truck full of christmas trees have been stolen.
Police admit they are stumped.
I saw a documentary today about a submarine that recycles 87% of its garbage.
But I believe this sub's doing even better!
Did you hear about the 2 Tow Truck drivers who wanted to elope?
They got hitched.
Every morning when I leave home, a bike comes from somewhere and runs me over. It’s a vicious cycle.
What do you call it when a truck of tortoises crashes into an aquarium?
A turtle disaster.
Who should drive home out of the two friends?
The one who is not tired.
Why do you only drive automatics?
‘I could never find a manual.’
What did the teacher say when he could not get into his car?
‘Oh no, I have lost my Kias!’
Did you hear about the submarine industry?
It really took a dive...
Why don’t cars enjoy long drives?
They find them a drag.
I once had my identity stolen by a cement truck driver. It took me ages to track him down, but now I have concrete evidence.
Have you heard about Amazon’s plan to make intercontinental shipments using electric submarine drones?
They’re projecting a large increase in e-fish-in-sea.
Why did the bicycle fall over?
Because it was too tired..
It’s never great taking a truck driver to the cinema to watch a film. They only really like the trailers.
What do the Scottish cars wear as hats?
Flat-caps.
What do you call a square that got into a car accident?
A rect-angle
There’s only one thing in the truck world that is bigger than a tow truck, and that’s a foot truck.
If you ride your bike twice a day, is that recycling?
How does a car express love to another?
‘I a door you.’
What do you call a drunk person fumbling with their car keys?
A taxi
What is a car’s favourite movie character?
Aerial from The Little Mermaid.
I told my boyfriend I'd missed the bus.
He asked me what I was trying to hit it with.
I got fired from my job as a submarine pilot.
I just don't get it. My performance reviews always said my work was sub-standard.
What is a car’s favourite colour?
Racing car green.
I tried to make a wooden submarine.
It didn't go down so well.
BREAKING: The United States, after mistaking it for an Iranian submarine, has struck a utility submarine with an underwater torpedo that was en route to displace the shipping carrier blocking the Suez Canal, killing all 169 aboard
whoops wrong sub
Electric cars can't get exhausted...
...but they can get wheely tired.
Anyone who is born in a car and dies outside is known as car born die oxide.
Why did the submarine driver lose his job
Old, racist tweets resurfaced
Why did the bus driver eat a burger? He wanted to 'bus-t' his energy!
Where do bus drivers eat their lunches? In a traffic jam.
I heard that a truck carrying Scrabble tiles has just overturned… Well, that’s the word on the street, anyway.
Which car do sheep drive?
Su-baa-ru.
I always like to keep a jar of peanut butter in the car when I travel on a busy freeway ...
just in case there’s a traffic jam.
What do you call a guy who only rides children's bicycles?
A pedalphile
How advanced are the inner workings of a submarine?
It goes very deep
I saw a lady riding a camel and being pulled by a truck...
It was a camel tow
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