Artists are colorful people who know how to draw on their emotions.
What do zombies use to color their hair?
Dye of the dead!
Q. What did the bully do to the orange?
A. Beat him to a pulp.
Blue jeans are immortal. They never die, they just fade away!
If you live in a purple-colored house and suddenly all the power goes off, then you should probably check the fuchsia box.
My dad and I saw this girl with a colorful backpack covered in pot leaves
He turned to me and said "thats a dope backpack". He is catching onto my slang.
Why did the artist get into a heated argument with the gallery curator? He just wasn't in the right frame of mind.
The nurse always carried a red pen in her pocket in case she needed to draw blood.
The skeleton would love to see the latest horror flick, but he just doesn't have the guts for it.
Friend of mine got sacked as a set designer for not producing anything. He didn't make a scene.
Why did Van Gogh become a painter? Because he just didn't have an ear for music.
I went to a new kind of show yesterday, which was hosted by a color-changing lizard. He was a good stand-up chameleon.
Do black and white count as colors?
It's a gray area.
It's tough to tell if the sky is ever happy or not. It always looks so blue!
Don't theater jokes always seem so staged?
The pirate steals arrrrt when he has the chance.
Q. What do you get when you combine Blue Agave and literature?
A. Tequila Mockingbird
It's weird being colorblind in an art gallery. Everything's a pigment of the imagination.
What did the artist ask the preschooler? Can you count to pen?
My colleague kept on missing deadlines, so I advised him not to bite off more than he can blue!
The artist shouldn't have taken that sculpture for granite, now it's stone-cold.
If you photograph your pimples, is zit art?
Q: How does an artist fill in a CV?
A: He draws on experience.
Which barnyard animal is a famous painter?
Vincent Van Goat
Why do old artists never die? They just put things in perspective.
I'd hate to be the bearer of bad blues.
A con artist is an artist who draws pictures of criminal suspects.
After checking my poor results, the art teacher shouted, "Never in a vermilion years have I seen such poor grades"!
What's brown and sticky? A stick.
When I broke my brother's favorite toy, he turned absolutely red in anger.
Don't get caught between a chalk and a hard place.
Couple of friends have decided to put theatre style seats in their house. It will end in tiers.
When you meet someone, you don't want to get off to a bad art!
When I went into my art lesson covered in yeast and flower, my teacher said I was the perfect roll-model.
The coffee shop owner was afraid. He wanted to know if the shop had ground to operate in the black.
Red wasn't feeling very well for the past few weeks. He has been diagnosed with scarlet fever.
Show your popcorn and coke guy at the movies a little appreciation. After all, he makes a lot of concessions.
I just found out that Mercedes is donating state-of-the-art street sweepers to some of the largest cities around the world to help fight littering.
They're calling it Mercedes-clenz.
My favorite denim blue jeans just turned brown. I think I will have to call it Dung-arees!
I was going to joke about my broken pencil, but it was pointless.
I tried to come up with a funny theatre joke, but it was all just an act.
What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.
Coming to theaters: the thrilling tale of a man who ate biographical books instead of turkey on Thanksgiving.
Baste on a true story.
Why did the bald man decide to paint a bunch of rabbits on his head? He thought that they could look like hares from a distance.
Blue and orange are always polite and amicable with each other because they are complementary colors.
My friend impresses girls by drawing realistic pictures of trucks. He's a pickup artist!
What did the artist say to his old friend? Let's clay in touch.
The stage is the most hygienic place in the world. Every time we turn on the lights they get a wash.
How did Salvador Dali like to start his mornings? With a bowl of Surreal and milk.
Librarians don't like drinking white wine. They prefer the well red ones!
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