Did you hear about the painter who works in jail? They say he had a brush with the law.
What do you call an artist without a palette? Someone who makes paintings without taste.
A friend of mine was describing an exotic bird to me and asked what was orange and sounded like a parrot. I told him, "A carrot".
I'd hate to be the bearer of bad blues.
I went to a new kind of show yesterday, which was hosted by a color-changing lizard. He was a good stand-up chameleon.
The snow leopard appeared just at the time our guide predicted it. It appeared white on time!
Why did the girl decide to become an art dealer? Because she wanted more Monet.
Why did the Lord of the Rings author get kicked out of the movie theatre.
He was Tolkien all the way through.
The leech, who is good at drawing blood, applied for a job in an art gallery.
The favorite fruit of all ghost's are Bloooooo-berries!
My theater group is writing a sci-fi thriller about classical musicians.
I'll be Bach.
Thankfully, not too many thieves are interested in acting on stage. They'd surely steal the show.
Did you hear about the artist that has been drawing very small, colorful noodles?
He drew an itsy, bitsy, teeny-weeny, yellow, polka dot linguini.
Why the skeleton doesn't go to the theater?
Because he has nobody to go with.
Theatre costumes must be handled with care since they're often laced with something.
Did you hear about the colorful sea cow?
Oh the hue-manatee!!!
How did Salvador Dali like to start his mornings? With a bowl of Surreal and milk.
Librarians don't like drinking white wine. They prefer the well red ones!
This hottie has forever changed the film industry, and it starts with the letter P and ends with 'orn'. Reel your mind back in - we're talking popcorn!
Q. Why are orange jokes so dumb?
A. Because oranges are afraid to concentrate.
What did the arirst say to his friend who was stressed? Don't worry, paintbrush it off.
An actor I know fell through the floor recently. It's just a stage he was going through.
What did the artist ask the preschooler? Can you count to pen?
What's green and sings? Elvis Parsley.
What did the art teacher say to the aspiring actress? You sure look the art.
Colors laugh by saying, "Hue Hue Hue."
The computer had to visit the dentist at the very earliest opportunity as it had a BlueTooth!
I wasn't expecting to be diagnosed as colour blind.
It really came out of the purple.
Coming to theaters: the thrilling tale of a man who ate biographical books instead of turkey on Thanksgiving.
Baste on a true story.
The only thing that is black and white and has to be red all over is a newspaper.
Blue jeans are immortal. They never die, they just fade away!
If you photograph your pimples, is zit art?
Whenever my wife is upset I let her color in my black and white tattoos
She just really needed a shoulder to crayon
What do you call a chameleon that can't change colors?
A reptile dysfunction.
What was Moses' favorite color?
Red, see?
All theatres love to see scarecrows out in the audience as reviewers! They're simply outstanding in their field.
A mixture of black, white, and red usually refers to a panda who has experienced severe sunburn!
If you don't focus on learning your lines for the production, I shutter to imagine what the reviewers will snap about.
I knew a guy who gave away his art but he only seemed to paint ducks with incomplete faces.
I asked about it once and he said "I like to bill them later."
When I went into my art lesson covered in yeast and flower, my teacher said I was the perfect roll-model.
Why did the origami artist win her court case? She was great at doing the paperwork.
I went to a theater performance done on a bunch of dictionaries the other day...
It was a play on words.
Q. Which dinosaur species has deep blue-green feathers?
A. Teal-Rex.
I keep looking at our upstage platform that is designed with only a ladder for access. It's just so hard not to stair.
Q. What did one artistic colored pencil say to another?
A. Bro, you are lookin' sharp today!
While building a house, the architect took his fingers and dipped them in a jar of blue ink. He wanted to get the blueprints!
What's a lion's favorite color?
ROARange
I told the artist that his painting was terrible. I think he got the picture.
What did the artist say to his old friend? Let's clay in touch.
What do zombies use to color their hair?
Dye of the dead!
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