Wine Lovers Rhyme: A friend of wine is a friend of mine!
"You had me at merlot."
Happy Hour is at wine o’ clock
"Great minds drink alike."
My wife hates it when I mess with her red wine. I added fruit and orange juice, and now she sangria than ever!
"It's wine o'clock."
Where do connoisseurs lock up their best bottles?
In a wine cabernet.
Which type of wine do horses request most often?
Chardon-neigh.
"Sip, sip hooray."
"Alcohol you later."
"Stop and smell the rosé."
"No wine left behind."
"Cabernet. More like, caber-yay!"
"Is that a yay or cabernet?"
"I mead more wine."
Which type of wine only comes in a box?
Carbordeaux.
What is a terrorist's preferred kind of wine?
White Infidel.
How did the vineyard launch the new champagne making business?
They crashed a small boat into it.
"Hakuna Moscato. It means drink wine."
What should you do with an old inventory of fine French wine?
Liquidate it to the highest bidder.
This kind of wine does not go right through you. Trust me, you will pee no noir.
I like my wine sweet and my humor dry.
"You are so bottlefull to me."
"Another glass? Wine not?!"
Vine Thought of the Day: Choosy moms choose wine!
Wino Woe: Forgive me, for I have zinned!
"Will you accept this rosé?"
Why do we love wine puns?
Because they're grape!
Party Host: Would you like to try some mulled wine?
Party Guest: I'll have to think it over...
"Love the wine you're with."
"Read between the wines."
Are there any funny red wine puns at BabaMail Jokes?
You bet Shiraz there are!
The problem with collecting wine is that you always end up getting screwed.
"I need to re-wine my life."
Why did the wine connoisseur insist on drinking from an old tire?
He heard it was a Goodyear!
There’s a hair in my wine. The grapes must have been fur-mented.
"Be kind, re-wine."
Fine Wine Pick-Up Line: Hey babe, what are you doing this fall? 'Cause I'd like to make you part of the season's harvest.
I hear you like wine, too. Grape minds think alike.
Why do winos love cheap wine puns?
Because wine snobs hate them!
Wine Connoisser Point to Ponder: Did Marilyn drink Merlot?
"My day just went from super to sip-erb, real quick."
Somehow they knew I wanted champagne. It was chilling.
What kind of wine do they serve at the horse races?
Chardon-neigh!
You’re wine in a million.
"Here for the right riesling."
Why does your grandma like wine so much?
Because at her age, she needs glasses!
"It isn't good to keep things bottled up."
"Let's get fizzical. Pass the prosecco."
Don’t ask me why I love wine. I have my rieslings.