"It isn't good to keep things bottled up."
"Stop and smell the rosé."
There’s a hair in my wine. The grapes must have been fur-mented.
"Chardonnay or should I go?"
Whenever I feel like wining, I remind myself to put a cork in it.
Which sports team do wine lovers always root for?
The Reds!
Why have a mer little when you can have a merlot?
"Here for the right riesling."
"I'm not a wino. I'm a wineYES!"
"On cloud wine."
Where do connoisseurs lock up their best bottles?
In a wine cabernet.
Are there any funny red wine puns at BabaMail Jokes?
You bet Shiraz there are!
Why do we love wine puns?
Because they're grape!
Party Host: Would you like to try some mulled wine?
Party Guest: I'll have to think it over...
"Alcohol you later."
You’re wine in a million.
"Hakuna Moscato. It means drink wine."
What do sailors drink when they gather at a tavern to commiserate?
Port whine!
Why do wine lovers guzzle down vine humor?
Because wine jokes are a barrel of laughs.
I hear you like wine, too. Grape minds think alike.
Why do we enjoy wine jokes?
Because they're de-vine!
"I need to re-wine my life."
"Adulting makes me wine."
Somehow they knew I wanted champagne. It was chilling.
"Let's get fizzical. Pass the prosecco."
Why did Wonder Woman rescue the Wine?
Because that's what grape lady superheroes do!
"My day just went from super to sip-erb, real quick."
Why does your grandma like wine so much?
Because at her age, she needs glasses!
What kind of wine do traffic cops like best?
Fine wine!
The problem with collecting wine is that you always end up getting screwed.
"Say you'll be wine."
Don’t ask me why I love wine. I have my rieslings.
What type of wine is notorious for making you drowsy?
Sauvign-yawn blanc!
"Cabernet. More like, caber-yay!"
Don’t hang around booze hounds. They’re wine-y bitches.
"Back that glass up."
Gluten-free, dairy-free, fat-free – I love this new Champagne Diet!
"I mead more wine."
Fine Wine Pick-Up Line: Hey babe, what are you doing this fall? 'Cause I'd like to make you part of the season's harvest.
Vine Thought of the Day: Choosy moms choose wine!
"Oh, sweet child of wine."
How does cabernet like to travel abroad?
On a cruise sip.
What is a terrorist's preferred kind of wine?
White Infidel.
Happy Hour is at wine o’ clock
What does a cat lady say on Friday night?
I am drinking wine and feline fine!
What should you do with an old inventory of fine French wine?
Liquidate it to the highest bidder.
What do you call the guy who chooses a suitable fortified Spanish wine?
A Sherry Picker.
What happened when a clumsy sommelier tried to decant a bottle of fine wine?
Things went pour-ably wrong.
"Be kind, re-wine."
Why did the wine connoisseur insist on drinking from an old tire?
He heard it was a Goodyear!