Why did the FBI surround the president with cows? They were beefing up security!”
The other day I asked an Alaskan guy if he wanted to eat some seal meat.
He wasn’t really inuit
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef!
How did the hotdog overcome his fear of ketchup? He mustered up the courage.
How do you defeat a meat-loving vampire? With a steak to the heart!
What did the lovesick pig sing to his girlfriend? Don't go bacon my heart!
What do you call a sausage that's been to the doctor? Cured meat!
Salami get this straight - you don't like meat puns?!
I met a girl in a vegetarian restaurant who said she recognized me, but I have literally never seen herbivore.
You really ate dog meat? How was it?
.... ruff
Cows don’t make very good cops. They refuse to go on steak outs.
Some types of meat like to play around a lot. These are generally the game types.
Cows love music. In fact, they even have a favourite note: beef flat.
What did the steak say when he came across his nemesis? Ah, we meat again!”
What did the steak say to his girlfriend? You're the apple of my rib-eye!
Hot dog, I love a good meat pun.
Are you a big fan of beef? I am. In fact, I could eat it until the cows come home.
My doctor told me to cut down on red meat.
So, could you brown it up a bit?
Why did the pig become an actress? Because she was a real ham!
I invited a turkey over for dinner. He was very late for dinner – when I asked him about it, he said he was busy getting dressed.
The cow intestine dish was offal, but the pig organ tacos was grocer!
It’s not often that you find an eye anywhere but on the face. Cows, however, have a rib eye.”
Where do cows go to celebrate New Years Eve? To a meat ball!