"Everything happens for a riesling, right?"
What happened to the pig who liked pineapple? He turned into a porky-pine!
"Personally, I like people who peach on time, and are always punctual," said the strawberry.
The unluckiest berry in the group is the one that drew the short straw-berry.
I got canned from a Orange juice factory...
Just couldn't concentrate.
How does a vampire make tea? With a used tampon.
What is the perfect name for a sad strawberry? It is called a blueberry.
What's the difference between a bipolar person and a loft full of lemons?
One's a bit erratic and the other's a bitter attic.
Why should you bake bacon on an asteroid on its way to Earth ?
It's meteor.
I came across a man who was eating strawberries at the bank. He told me he wanted to eat rich food.
Dad: How does a farmer keep his cows in line?
Kids: How?
Dad: He keeps them a-cow-ntable!