What do peach soldiers say to each other before they are sent into combat? – “Good luck and make sure you come back in one peach!”
My friend mashed up some cherries on halloween and said they were blood. I was cherry-fied!
What did the coffee lover name his son?
Joe, obviously.
Where do cows write down their most intimate thoughts? Inside of their dairy.
While leaving, the peach friend told his sad buddy, "If you need any help, just peach out, I will be there."
One day, a young weasel went to the bar. The bartender took one look at him and says, “You are under-aged. I can’t serve you beer.” The weasel asks, “What can I have?”
The bartender replies, “I have bottled water, juice, energy drinks, and pop.”
“Pop!” goes the weasel.
Why did the blonde throw her favorite doll on the grill? She thought it was a Barbie-Q.
Where do bananas go to learn to be sweet?
Sundae School.
An Native American drank 100 cups of tea.
Next day they found him dead in his tea pee.
There are two types of people in this world: People who love chocolate and liars. A study says that chocolate may lower your chances of a stroke. That is, a swimming stroke, a golf stroke, a tennis stroke.
Q: What do you get when you walk around with cherries in your shoes?
A: Toe jam.