Boy: Oh I can't believe that Jesus is so sweet! Girl: Well that's because He's a life saver!
Why are cherries unassuming? Because they often get made into humble pie.
Nobody would ask the strawberry to go to the prom because it was past her sale by date.
Picking strawberries can be a very fruitful endeavor!
Did you know that if you poured salt on a cat's tail it will fall off?
It's true! And if you pour pepper on a cat's tail, the pepper will also fall off.
Q: How do you make a blueberry?
A: You strangle a pea.
What’s the National Donut Day theme song?
“Donut Stop Believing.”
I always tend to forget the french word for strawberry sometimes. But, then I eventually remember the fraise.
What do you call a strong pumpkin?
A Jacked-o-Lantern.
What type of wine is notorious for making you drowsy?
Sauvign-yawn blanc!
I asked the Korean grocer for something to spice up my meals, but I think I got a raw dill.
What’s the worst thing about a bread pun?
It tends to get stale.
What is the pineapple’s relationship status? Pineapply married.
This corn is a little rough to the touch. Looks like a job for Kernel Sanders.
Which fruity singer was a judge on 'The X Factor'? Cherry Cole.
What's the difference between a bipolar person and a loft full of lemons?
One's a bit erratic and the other's a bitter attic.
What do you call someone who chokes on their tea?
A cough-y drinker.
Why did the two slices of bread disappear in the middle of the night? They wanted to e-loaf together.
What's the name of the meatiest Knight of the Round Table? Sir Loin!
What would you call two banana skins? A pair of slippers!
This might sound corny, but I think you’re a-maize-ing.
Q: Why are orange and banana phones so popular these days?
A: They have appeal.
She drank so much coffee at work, she considered it part of her daily grind.
When I proposed to my fiancee, she started crying. It must be because I proposed to her with an onion ring.
Why did the Iron Chef have to stop cooking? He ran out of Thyme.
There are two types of people in this world: People who love chocolate and liars. A study says that chocolate may lower your chances of a stroke. That is, a swimming stroke, a golf stroke, a tennis stroke.
"Cabernet. More like, caber-yay!"
Do you want to hear a pizza joke? Never mind it's too cheesy.
"Stop and smell the rosé."
Have a s-mash-ing birthday!
Did you hear about the crime family that took over the wine importing business?
They call themselves the Sip-ranos!
Vegetarians can't eat anything with beans in. They don't eat food with a pulse.
Whenever I give my daughter cherries, she stuffs them in the chair
Now we call them chairries
The soup that my mom made for dinner healed my flu in a day. It was almost soup-er natural.
What do elephants drink on vacation?
Peanut coladas.
Why was the slice of bread upset with her husband?
He told her she was being too kneady.
What do you call cheese that is acting crazy? A basket queso.
What became of the pig who got fired from his job? He became canned ham.
I made a pie with a can of peas in. Pea-can pie. It didn't taste how I imagined.
Soup is only musical when it is piping hot.
Where did the nut keep his money?
In his cash shoe.
I once attended the saddest watermelon funeral I’ve ever been to. I gotta say, I’ve never seen anything so meloncholy in my life.
What do cannibals eat for dessert? Chocolate covered aunts.
Where does wine catch up on all the vineyard dirt?
Through the grapevine.
Did you hear about the banana who went to the doctor's because he wasn't peeling very well?
What did the boss say to his pizza during their meeting?
There’s mushroom for improvement.
I switched labels in my wife's spice cabinet.
She hasn't noticed, but the thyme is cumin.
I didn’t know you could vape a chocolate bar until my wife told me to stop inhaling them.
Peas excuse how bad this pun is.
What type of chocolate do they sell at the airport?
Plane Chocolate!