Did you know that bread that you make into buns is always relaxed? Yes, they just like to roll with it.
Why did the man keep punching his doughy friend?
To get a rise out of him!
You knead me in your loaf. This one kind of works, but loaf is just a little too different from life.
The bag of flour was so confused.He thought that he saw his friend the loaf yeast-erday.
It’s too bad that bread puns are always so crumby. Mmm . . . crumbs.
Did you hear what happened with the sourdough bread? It really rose to the occasion today.
In the 1970s, hippies loved going to a Grateful Dead concert and getting toasted. That’s certainly the truth.
What’s the worst thing about a bread pun?
It tends to get stale.
Why was the slice of bread upset with her husband?
He told her she was being too kneady.
The manager at the bread store told the baker that he had to stop loafing around. The baker said that it was his job.
Do you know why bread hates warm weather? It just makes things too toasty.
Why did the aging bread roll retire?
Her career was already toast.
What did the toast say to the psychic?
You bread my mind!
How do you get a raise at the bread factory?
Butter up your boss.
That wide loaf has a decent bread-th. Nice.
A new bakery in town began ding extremely well. They said that business was definitely on the rise.
They say that the local baker is the breadwinner of his family. True enough.
The two loaves of bread could not wait to stare through the delivery room window. They wanted to see their new bun-dle of joy.
The baker just felt this incredible knead to make bread. That’s certainly the truth.
Did you hear the little loaves playing hide-and-seek earlier? They kept yelling, “Bready or not, here I come!”
Ciabatta stay away from me because I don’t want naan of that. That’s one way to tell someone to keep away.
You know why I love bread puns? Because they never go stale.
What did one bread say to another after a long day? Don’t worry because tomorrow will be butter.
The young loaf of bread ended up getting fired from his job because he kept loafing around. Poor guy.
"Are you sure about this?"
"Crust me, I'm on a roll."
What did one slice of bread say to the other before the race?
You’re toast!
"What did the toaster say to the slice of bread?" "I want you inside me!"
Why was the chef surprised that anyone like her bread?
She thought it was crumby.
What does a loaf of bread say when breaking up with his girlfriend?
You deserve butter.
Did you hear about the bread party? It’s scone be a lot of fun, and wheat love for you to join us.
How did the baker cut four loaves of bread at the same time? By buying a four-loaf-cleaver.
When I tried taking a picture of my bread load, it came out grainy. I think that that is a common problem.
Why was the bread actor so unhappy?
She lost out on a juicy roll.
Did you hear about the sign on the bakery that got everyone talking? It said “I knead dough to live.”
Why did the two slices of bread disappear in the middle of the night? They wanted to e-loaf together.
Do you know how to get a raise at the bread factory? Try buttering up to the boss.
What does bread say to a friend after doing them a favor?
It’s the yeast I could do.
The young lady had to throw her toaster in the trash. She was diagnosed as black-toast intolerant.
Why were the kids throwing flour and bread at their school? They wanted to rise to the occasion.
What did the mother bread tell her baby roll? You really are the apple of my rye.
What do bread kids say during hide-and-seek?
Bready or not, here I crumb!
Did you hear about the secret guild of bakers? They say that they only trade recipes on a knead to know basis.
Why did the slice of bread leave her boyfriend? She thought that he was just too knead-y.
Do you know what you call it when you place beef between two slices of bread? You get a bull-only sandwich.
The cheap baker only paid his employees a flourly rate. Cheapskate!
The bread baker won the girl over because he kept giving her a flour. How sweet!
Did you hear about the man who quit his job at a bakery? They said that it left him loathe of bread.
Why did the butter keep talking? Because he felt like he was really on a roll.
The two slices of bread decided to leave the bakery. I heard that they wanted to grow mold together.
Why does bread hate hot weather?
It just feels too toasty.