In the 1970s, hippies loved going to a Grateful Dead concert and getting toasted. That’s certainly the truth.
Why was the baker in a serious panic? He thought that he was in a loaf or death situation.
Wholey-grain! You really bread my mind!
Thank you for helping me. Biscuit’s the yeast I could do.
What did the banker want from the baker?
To pump her nickels.
The bread did not believe that he could work at his job much longer. He was feeling too crusty.
Did you hear about the man who quit his job at a bakery? They said that it left him loathe of bread.
What does a loaf of bread say when breaking up with his girlfriend?
You deserve butter.
What does bread say to a friend after doing them a favor?
It’s the yeast I could do.
How do you make dog bread?
Just use collie flour.
hat’s the most sophisticated kind of bread?
The upper crust.
Why did the two slices of bread disappear in the middle of the night? They wanted to e-loaf together.
The manager at the bread store told the baker that he had to stop loafing around. The baker said that it was his job.
The young lady had to throw her toaster in the trash. She was diagnosed as black-toast intolerant.
They say that the local baker is the breadwinner of his family. True enough.
Did you hear about the sign on the bakery that got everyone talking? It said “I knead dough to live.”
Did you hear what happened with the sourdough bread? It really rose to the occasion today.
What’s the worst thing about a bread pun?
It tends to get stale.
The mother helped her child bake bread because it was a labor of loaf. True enough.
Why were the kids throwing flour and bread at their school? They wanted to rise to the occasion.
Why was the bread actor so unhappy?
She lost out on a juicy roll.
What did one bread lover say to the other?
Before I break down and rye, I want you to know that I loaf you.
It’s too bad that bread puns are always so crumby. Mmm . . . crumbs.
The cheap baker only paid his employees a flourly rate. Cheapskate!
What do bread kids say during hide-and-seek?
Bready or not, here I crumb!
The bread baker won the girl over because he kept giving her a flour. How sweet!
Why does bread looks so bad in photographs?
It’s just too grainy.
"Scone be a lot of fun. Wheat love for you to join us."
Why did the butter keep talking? Because he felt like he was really on a roll.
You knead me in your loaf.
Did you hear about the secret guild of bakers? They say that they only trade recipes on a knead to know basis.
The two loaves of bread could not wait to stare through the delivery room window. They wanted to see their new bun-dle of joy.
I’m a wrapper, so I get a lot of dough. A bread wrapper, that is.
Ciabatta stay away from me because I don’t want naan of that. That’s one way to tell someone to keep away.
Did you hear? The pilgrims rode the May-Flour so that they could bake bread as they went to America. This is a cute option.
Challah if you see me in the streets. Will do.
I had thought of a lot of good bread puns, but they seem to have gone a rye. I know the feeling.
Why was the chef surprised that anyone like her bread?
She thought it was crumby.
Why does bread hate hot weather?
It just feels too toasty.
The tiny bag of flour got in trouble, so his mother sent him to bread early. He kneaded to be punished.
It’s too bad the man couldn’t quit his job at the bakery. He really kneaded the dough.
What was the main job of the bread truck? To haul buns.
What did one slice of bread say to the other before the race?
You’re toast!
How does bread win over friends?
“You can crust me.”
They fired the loaf of bread from her job. They say that she kept breaking down and would rye on the job.
You knead me in your loaf. This one kind of works, but loaf is just a little too different from life.
A new bakery in town began ding extremely well. They said that business was definitely on the rise.
"You focaccia bag, crumb back and get it."
Why did the slice of bread leave her boyfriend? She thought that he was just too knead-y.
That wide loaf has a decent bread-th. Nice.