Everyone was spot on, you really did make a great theatre lighting tech.
My theater group is writing a sci-fi thriller about classical musicians.
I'll be Bach.
I tried to come up with a funny theatre joke, but it was all just an act.
Thankfully, not too many thieves are interested in acting on stage. They'd surely steal the show.
We should've guessed the failed postman wouldn't be any better at delivering his acting lines.
I had a job directing an elementary school theater production.
It wasn't hard work, after all, it was child's play.
I thought the play was frightful but I saw it under particularly unfortunate circumstances - the curtain was up.
All theatres love to see scarecrows out in the audience as reviewers! They're simply outstanding in their field.
My buddy was cast in Snow White and The Seven Dwarfs, but he was still angry because he wasn't Happy.
10 saxophone players blew up a theatre...
authorities are on the lookout for the tenorists.
An actor I know fell through the floor recently. It's just a stage he was going through.
I'm coming out of the closet to tell everyone I was just hired as a seamstress for the theatre.
Don't theater jokes always seem so staged?
A prankster played a really dark and dim-witted joke at the theatre. He turned off the lights.
I seem to find a way of sneaking chocolate into movie theaters..
.. I always have a few twix up my sleeve.
What did the thief steal on the theatre's opening night? The spotlight.
It may just be a stage I'm going through, but I sure do love the trapdoors on set.
I keep looking at our upstage platform that is designed with only a ladder for access. It's just so hard not to stair.
Show your popcorn and coke guy at the movies a little appreciation. After all, he makes a lot of concessions.
Theater sound guys aren't always good speakers
My friend told me he had to leave the play after Act l. Knowing he'd waited forever to see it, I asked him why. He said the program stated that Act ll was two years later, and he refused to wait that long.
Who are the biggest fans at the theatre? The backstage crew - They're always giving props to the actors.
Tried acting in a theatre full of farmers. Got mooed off stage.
Our backstage manager is leaving at the end of the year. He has been an outstanding member of our theatre team.
Props to him.
Coming to theaters: the thrilling tale of a man who ate biographical books instead of turkey on Thanksgiving.
Baste on a true story.
10 saxophone players blew up a theatre...
authorities are on the lookout for the tenorists.
My dad always said the secret to theatre was to always leave them wanting more.
He was a great guy but a terrible anaesthetist.
You know why theater people say "break a leg" instead of good luck?
Because if you do, you'll end up in a cast!
Couple of friends have decided to put theatre style seats in their house. It will end in tiers.
The stage is the most hygienic place in the world. Every time we turn on the lights they get a wash.
There are two people who both claim to live in the building where Shakespeare wrote Romeo & Juliet. They should put a plaque on both their houses.
When the theatre owner dies, his visitation hours are as follows: 1pm, 3pm, 6:30 pm, 9pm, and midnight.
Great news! I'm a movie director now! I gave stellar directions to a very lovely family on their way to the theatre.
Why the skeleton doesn't go to the theater?
Because he has nobody to go with.
Today, we had to create a new hang position for some lighting fixtures. After all day trying, we couldn't get the new batten hung properly.
Turns out it was just a pipe dream.
The skeleton would love to see the latest horror flick, but he just doesn't have the guts for it.
Why do thespians have great hair? They want the perfect part.
Q: Did you hear about the blonde couple that were found frozen to death in their car at the drive-in movie theatre?
A: They apparently went to see "Closed For The Winter"
Friend of mine got sacked as a set designer for not producing anything. He didn't make a scene.
Why did the penguin enter the theatre?
He wanted to go into snow business
Building a good makeup design always starts with a good foundation.
Why do poltergeists love haunting old theaters?
Because they can't wait to boo the performers.
The ghost scared all the boys who ventured into the haunted house and then varnished into the almirah!
I wonder why theatres are so sad? They're always dark, moody, and in tiers.
I just got fired from my theatre job. I guess I should've made a bigger scene about it.
Theatre costumes must be handled with care since they're often laced with something.
A friend has joined a blonds only theatre group. Fair play to him.
This hottie has forever changed the film industry, and it starts with the letter P and ends with 'orn'. Reel your mind back in - we're talking popcorn!
Never date a Theater person...
... wayyy too much Drama...
I gave someone directions to a theater today
I guess I am a movie director now.
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