What do you call a fashionable, but judgmental monster who howls at the moon?
A What Not To Wear-Wolf.
Can’t wait for the first married woman to walk on the red planet.
Just so I can ask if there’s wife on Mars.
Why does NASA give astronauts pencils to use in space?
Because they've got the Write Stuff.
Are Earth and Moon good friends? Yes, they’ve been going around together for many years now.
What kind of light goes around the earth? A Satel-lite.
What do you think they use in space, when they run out of the drinking cups? The Big Dipper.
Is that the Dog star? You can’t be Sirius!
Scientists have found that the center of Jupiter… has the letter i.
Why don't pets make good astronauts?
They're afraid of the spay station
Why does Venus have a crush on the sun?
Because the sun is really hot.
The moon landing is obviously fake.
The moon is clearly still up there.
Why does a Moon-rock taste better than an Earth-rock?
Because it's a little meteor.
Why is the taste of moon rock better than that of Earth rock? Because it’s a little meteor.
How do astronauts prepare for a birthday party
They planet.
Why haven't the aliens visited earth yet?
They read the reviews... only one star.
Why would a cow want to go to space? To see the Milky Way.
What do you say to an astronaut looking for a car park
There's a spaceman.
What will you do when you will see a spaceman? You will simply park your car, man!
I’m currently reading a book on anti-gravity and it’s impossible to put it down.
What will you do if you come across a green alien? I’ll simply wait until it’s ripe.
Do scientists who study the sun have a flare for research?
How do you put a baby astronaut to sleep?
You rocket.
How does the moon cut his hair?
Eclipse it.
What do you call an overweight alien?
An extra cholesterol.
My daughter asked me, "Why are the two planets coming close together?"
"Well, you see... When two planets love each other they can come together in holy astro nomy."
Have you found the center of gravity yet? It’s the letter v.
What will you call a crazy spaceman? An astronaut.
There’s a lot of proposals on cleaning up space in earth’s orbit from broken satellites.
Looks like they’ll need a vacuum cleaner.
Every time when I see a picture of something amazing in space, I usually say “That’s totally far out.”
What does Earth get on Earth day ?
A birthday quake !
How did the aliens hurt the farmer?
They trod on his corn.
Where do aliens park their flying saucers?
At a parking meteor.
Do you know why no one has ever been sentenced for crimes committed on the moon?
Because it's a gray area.
What are Astronauts doing when they do a mistake?
They Apollogize
When NASA will put 20 heads of cattle into the outer space, it will be the 1st herd shot around the entire world.
"Hi, I'm Buzz Aldrin. Second person to step on the moon.
Neil before me."
The satellite went into the orbit, right on January 1st, causing a New Year’s revolution.
An astronaut who normally fails on a weightlessness experiment, might surely be aware of the gravity of the situation.
Last evening I walked up the hill in the park to see the planets. Stumbled over a lip in the concrete and went down pretty hard. Ripped pants and skinned hands and knees. When I got to the top I couldn't see a thing.
The view was NOT worth the trip.
I don’t get why people buy into the flat earth theory.
I mean, the arguments for it aren’t exactly well rounded.
What is the best day to go to the beach? Sunday, of course!
What do you call a meal from the moon?
A satellite dish.
What do planets like to read?
Comet books.
My wife will never forget falling asleep in the sun with her breast exposed.
It’s forever burned in her mammary.
Living costs on the moon would probably be out of this world.
Why didnt the moon go outside?
Because it was waning.
Why don't aliens get hungry after being blasted into space?
Because they've just had a big launch.
What did Neil Armstrong say when people didn't laugh at his moon jokes?
"I guess you had to be there."
Which candy do astronauts like? Marsbar.
Have you heard about the chef on space station? He’s not that much of an astronaut, but his food is literally out of this world!
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