What time do spacemen get up? Alien in the morning.
I debated a flat earther once. He stormed off saying he’d walk to the edge of the Earth to prove me wrong.
He’ll come around eventually.
How does a Man cut his hair on the moon? Eclipse it.
What planet is next to Uranus?
Poopiter.
What did the astronaut cook for lunch? An unidentifiable frying object.
When God integrated Planet Earth, he didn’t forget his integral calculus lesson.
He remembered to add the sea.
Which candy do astronauts like? Marsbar.
I've finally started to believe that Pluto is not really a planet...
Especially when I saw him in a cartoon.
Two astronauts who were dating, met up for a launch date.
Why don't aliens get hungry after being blasted into space?
Because they've just had a big launch.
How can astronauts get more protein in their diet? They make it meteor.
How does the moon cut his hair?
Eclipse it.
What is the best way to observe the two planets between Jupiter and Neptune?
Saturn Uranus.
Do scientists who study the sun have a flare for research?
Why did the Sun never got into college? Because it already has quite a million degrees!
What is a lightyear?
The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
Sun to Earth, on the night of 31st December:
"Let's have another round, shall we?"
What is the best day to go to the beach? Sunday, of course!
I got an e-mail saying, "At Google Earth we can read maps backwards!" and I thought to myself...
“That’s just spam.”
What do the astronauts put on their lunch toast? Space jam.
I woke up this morning and forgot which side the sun rises from, then it dawned on me.
What is an astronauts favourite type of shirt?
Apollo
I’m currently reading a book on anti-gravity and it’s impossible to put it down.
There’s a lot of proposals on cleaning up space in earth’s orbit from broken satellites.
Looks like they’ll need a vacuum cleaner.
Why does no one trust the man on the moon?Why does no one trust the man on the moon?
Because he has a dark side!
How did the astronaut die?
exposure to Mercury.
What is suns favorite chocolate bar?
A milky way.
How do you put a baby astronaut to sleep?
You rocket.
What did Mars tell to Saturn? Give me a ring sometime!
Why haven't the aliens visited earth yet?
They read the reviews... only one star.
Did you hear about the astronaut who stepped in gum?
He got stuck in Orbit.
Which hot drinks space people like? Gravi-tea.
Becoming a space pilot is not easy. It requires a good altitude.
What kind of magazines would the planets prefer to read? Cosmos.
How do you get a baby alien to sleep?
Rocket.
Warning! Do not look at the sun through a colander.
You'll strain your eyes.
Is that the Dog star? You can’t be Sirius!
"Dad, can you tell me what a solar eclipse is?"
"No sun."
What do you think holds the moon up? Moonbeams.
How many astronomers will it take to just change a lightbulb? None, they like the dark.
What would’ve happen if the Apollo astronauts stayed on the lunar surface for too long?
They would’ve been lunatics.
What holds the moon up?
Moonbeams!
Why didnt the moon go outside?
Because it was waning.
Living on Earth might be expensive. But we surely get a free trip around the sun every year!
What does someone mean by a light year? The same as a regular year, but with less calories and fat.
What do you call a wizard aboard a spacecraft?
A flying sorcerer.
What do you say to an astronaut looking for a car park
There's a spaceman.
Why does NASA give astronauts pencils to use in space?
Because they've got the Write Stuff.
Reading sun puns while sunbathing make one well red.
What is the angriest place on Earth?
Ire-land
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