When God integrated Planet Earth, he didn’t forget his integral calculus lesson.
He remembered to add the sea.
How does one astronaut says sorry on the moon tell another astronaut? He Apollo-gises.
What time do spacemen get up? Alien in the morning.
Why will you not want to give a bath to the Saturn? It would then leave a ring around the tub.
Did you hear about the restaurant they built on the moon?
The food is good but it lacks atmosphere.
Beer is the greatest beverage on earth.
That's my pint of view, anyway.
Got my friend an unnecessarily large rocket for bonfire night.
He's over the moon!He's over the moon!
How do you organise a welcome party for an alien race?
You planet.
Why did the Sun never got into college? Because it already has quite a million degrees!
How did the astronaut die?
exposure to Mercury.
What do you say to an astronaut looking for a car park
There's a spaceman.
"Dad, can you tell me what a solar eclipse is?"
"No sun."
How does the moon cut his hair?
Eclipse it.
What did the astronaut cook for lunch? An unidentifiable frying object.
Reading sun puns while sunbathing make one well red.
What is an astronaut's favorite candy bar?
Milky way.
Living costs on the moon would probably be out of this world.
Why can’t people hear your scream in the space? Because it’s miles away.
Why don't pets make good astronauts?
They're afraid of the spay station
Wanna know a way for werewolves to howl other than the full moon?
Make them stub their toe.
If athletes can get “Athletes foot”, what can astronauts get? Missile Toe.
How does the sun say hi to the moon?
With a heat wave!
Where can you read about planets exploding?
In the orbituaries.
There’s a lot of proposals on cleaning up space in earth’s orbit from broken satellites.
Looks like they’ll need a vacuum cleaner.
The satellite went into the orbit, right on January 1st, causing a New Year’s revolution.
What are the best kind of flowers to get your girlfriend after screwing up?
Whoopsie Daisies
How do astronauts cook their meals?
With a Space Heater!
What is the best way to observe the two planets between Jupiter and Neptune?
Saturn Uranus.
Where do aliens park their flying saucers?
At a parking meteor.
The moon asked the sun: Buddy when you are so hot, why are you single yet?
Do scientists who study the sun have a flare for research?
"I heard some dictator wants to move the Earth further from the sun."
"Why??"
"Because it will take longer to make a full revolution."
What did Mars tell to Saturn? Give me a ring sometime!
What holds the moon up?
Moonbeams!
What type of elements know everybody on earth?
Met-all.
Why did the police arrest the star? That’s becuase it was a shooting star.
Flat-Earthers hate the fact our planet is spherical, whereas Asgard is flat.
It's a Thor subject for them.
What type of songs do planets sing?
Nep-Tunes.
Are Earth and Moon good friends? Yes, they’ve been going around together for many years now.
The earth's rotation really makes my day.
Have you heard the one about the spaceship that came to Earth?
Never mind its over your head.
How does one astronaut on the moon tell another astronaut that he is sorry?
He apollo-gises.
What is a lightyear?
The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
I thought about studying the astronomy for my university. But then I thought, I would just be taking up space.
Have you heard about the chef on space station? He’s not that much of an astronaut, but his food is literally out of this world!
Why should the Sun get into a school? To get brighter.
Why wouldn’t the Moon come to the Sun’s funeral?
It isn’t a mourning person
Why is the moon so conceited at times?
It becomes full of itself.
Where do Astronauts go to the bathroom?
Where no one has gone before.
There’s a big thunderstorm. The road is blocked by a big mudslide. A little boy asks his dad, “Why does earth fall down like that?”
His dad answers, “It’s terrain.”
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