What do you call it when you have to quickly eat a beef dish wrapped in pastry crust?
A brief Wellington
What do you call a turd made by the captain of a vessel?
The Captain's Log
Are you a flame? Because I think I found my perfect match.
What do you call two spine bones that are friends?
Vertebros.
What did the deer write in his journal every day? Deer diary.
What does the fish say when she disagrees with her husband?
I don’t quite sea it that way.
Summer is my favorite sea-sun of the year.
What’s the most supportive beer?
Root beer.
A big black bug bit a big black bear made the big black bear bleed blood.
What's yellow and black and yellow and black and yellow and black?
A wasp rolling down a hill.
Orange you excited for Halloween?
Don’t drop the ball – without you, the party will be incomplete.
What do they call the Hunger Games in France?
Battle Royale with Cheese.
Where do bugs go to watch the big game? Apple-Bees.
Unfortunately, the jumper cables are getting a divorce. They just had no spark.
Why did the engineering students leave class early? They were getting a little ANSI.
"Is it the tar that smells like farts?"
"No, it was your asphalt"
What’s a horse’s favorite sport?
Saddleball.
Please stop making jokes about little people
How would you feel if a bunch of giants made jokes about you?
The hipster beaver denied swimming in the river. He said it was too main-stream.
What did Neil Armstrong say when people didn't laugh at his moon jokes?
"I guess you had to be there."
What do you call a frozen frankfurter? A Chili dog.
What is a dog’s favorite pizza topping?
Pup-peroni.
What do goblins and ghosts drink when they’re hot and thirsty on Halloween?
Ghoul-aid!!!
I was walking home last night through the park, when this scary looking kid drew a knife on me...
The little brat used a permanent marker and it was a bastard to wash it off.
Why don't matches play baseball?
Because one strike, and they're out.
I think i spent way too much on this table. It is just not a foldable.
“I only like lemons,”
Said Michael zestfully.
What do you call a snowman that tells tall tales?
A snow-fake!
What do get when you cross a chili pepper, steam shovel, and a Chihuahua? A hot, diggety dog.
“Feliz navi-dog!”
Who is a snake’s favorite author?
William Snakespeare.
Why did the uncouth spud not stop talking during the football game?
Because he was a common-tater.
My wife was scratching the glass jar with a metal spoon...
It was jarring!!!
What does a couch say to another couch at the other side of the room?
We are sofa apart!
What did the chemist cowboy tell his horse? HIO Ag!
What do you call a werewolf that's found the cure for lycanthropy?
A lycan'tthrope.
Why does the fairy kingdom smell so awful?
Because of all the toad stools.
What do you call a cow with a twitch? Beef jerky.
I recently met a musical group of pirates.
They called themselves A-Band-On-Ship.
I'm fondue you, it's true
I was going to try putting a mushroom into my cola. I wanted to be a my cola gist.
Why are mice afraid of the water?
Because of catfish.
Why did the poor werewolf chase his own tail?
He was trying to make ends meet.
It's easier to prepare meals with this new cookware-wolf.
How do you get a Minecraft themed party started? Let them eat cake.
When banana growers are heart broken, what do they sing? What else but Peelings?
I prefer the new system to reviewing line calls. When Hawk-eye came around, I breathed a big Cy-clops of relief.
Why do Bigfoots like to tell jokes?
Because they're killer comedians.
Golf balls are like eggs…
They’re white, they are sold by the dozen, and a week later you have to buy more.
Go to BabaMail
