What do you get if you cross a frog with a ferry?
A hoppercraft.
Are you a card?
We're perfectly suited for each other
Why did the poor werewolf chase his own tail?
He was trying to make ends meet.
Chuck berry was undoubtedly the greatest rock and roll strawberry.
What do you call a group of orcas that play music?
An iPod.
How do you get from point A to point B?
Just take an x-y plane or a rhom’bus.
What did the toilet say to the urinal after it was hired?
“Urine!”
What do Snowmen call their offspring?
Chill-dren.
Is plate throwing a trully Olympic sport?
Discuss.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Peanut.
Peanut who?
Peanut butter open the door!
Walking through the farm and a group of pigs jumped out of a tree at me. It was a hambush.
What does Santa use after trimming his beard?
Elftershave.
What do geologists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms? A ferrous wheel.
What do you call it when it rains ducks and geese?
Fowl weather.
The builder beaver decided to launch a new liquid dam-building product, but the market was too saturated.
When you accidentally step on a cheerio, you become a cereal killer.
Shave a single shingle thin.
Emo bunnies just do not carrot all.
Why don’t monkeys play cards in the jungle?
Because there are too many cheetahs.
My bike chain got rusted. Then my whole bicycle broke down. It was a chain reaction.
Never going drinking with Train drivers again.
All they did all night was tell me to ‘chug,chug,chug,chug.’
Q. What kind of underwear do s*xy gorillas wear?
A. Chim-pant-zies.
Do you know which the most favourite type of fruit of trees is? The pine – apple.
What did the kid nut say to the other when playing tag? “I’m going to cashew”.
Whoever named it a television ...
Should've called it a watching machine.
My dad was fixing the basin in the bathroom and accidentally broke some tiles.
My mother said, "I told you that method would be fewtile".
I'm currently dating a famous soccer player. He's so loving and caring towards me.
He's a keeper.
Why do watermelons have fancy weddings? Because they cantaloupe.
An electrocuted turtle feels shell-shocked.
Have you heard of the hair stylist that refuses to cut hair?
If she won't cut hair to earn a living, she'll certainly dye.
What did the deer’s mother say to her daughter on her birthday?
“I remember the day you were fawn!”
What do skeletons hate the most about the wind?
Nothing. It goes right through them.
Got a universal remote for my Birthday.
Well, this changes everything.
How can someone tell if a bee is on their phone? They'll get a buzzy signal.
“Have your elf a merry little Christmas.”
What's a prisoners favorite building materials? Steal n cement.
What do you do if a rabbit keeps pooping in your yard? Take him to a pellet court.
I invented a device that can stop a snake in its tracks.
It's made of asphalt.
What time is it Julius? 8:02 Brutus.
What's a frog's favorite flower?
A croakus.
What did the clean dog say to the dirty dog?
Long time no flea.
Did you hear about the guy who overdosed on curry powder? He went into a korma.
Where do fish go to watch movies?
At the dive-in.
What’s the difference between Spring Break and Summer Break?
Jumping on the bed won’t make a Summer Break.
How long does it take for electricity to travel the length of a 10 car train?
It all depends on the conductor.
There's now a vaccine to make you better at geometry.
It's called Pythagorean Serum.
When we cross a deer and a mouse, what would we get?
“Mickey Moose!”
"learn to play piano by ear!"
"Thanks, I'd rather use my fingers."
I am still trying to launch beef and cream out of a mushroom cannon. It is not stroganoff.
If ten zombies run after you, what time is it?
Ten after one.
Go to BabaMail
