Why these days, the Moon is up till so late? Don’t worry, it is just going through a phase.
What kind of fish is only made of salt.
A tu-na.
What’s the difference between a buffalo and a bison?...
You can’t wash your hands in a buffalo.
Koi fish always travel in a groups of four
Because the predator will go after the D koi
I fernly beleaf my tree puns are qualitree, you can leaf me alone if you disagreen.
What kind of computer does a worm have? A Macintosh.
What is at the end of a rainbow?
The letter W.
The evil King of Weatherland only had one favorite weather - hail, storm.
Why did the cheerleader add extra salt to her food in the summer?
She wanted to do summer-salts.
Crossbows are great, but they have their drawbacks.
Ah! The element of surprise.
Two candies had a beautiful wedding. They were truly mint to be
How is bacon like southern Europe?
It's got a lot of Greece in it.
What did the queen bee say to the naughty bee? Beehive yourself.
Why do people take an instant dislike to real estate agents?
To save time.
What hairstyle did Moses get at the hairdressers?
A middle parting.
I got worried about climate change when realtors in Iowa started advertising their listings as “potential waterfront property.”
What kind of fruit salad is most resistant to sunburn?
The kind with extra melon in.
Which city do hamsters live in?
Hamsterdam.
How did the Mother Banana spoil the Baby Banana? She left him out in the sun too long.
Which barnyard animal is a famous painter?
Vincent Van Goat
What do you call an irate kangaroo?
A k-angry-oo.
Well, you have to hand it to relay runners, don't you?
Where are dead computer hackers buried?
In decrypt.
The bottom of the butter bucket is the buttered bucket bottom.
What is an elf's favorite kind of birthday cake? Shortcake!
My mother's sister can carry 50 times her own weight
She's my aunt
Are you a flame? Because I think I found my perfect match.
Did you get to hear his new collection of wolf puns? They are howl-arious, absolutely rib cracking.
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets!
How does a volleyball team welcome their new neighbors? With a block party.
What do you call an onion that is very valuable to jewelers? You call it a pearl onion.
Which cheese surrounds a medieval castle?
Moatzarella.
What is a dog’s ideal job?
A barkeologist.
What's the difference between and Buffalo and a Bison?
You can't wash your face in a Buffalo.
How do elephants bathe?
With their trunks on.
How do you tell others that your Israeli husband made coffee?
Hebrew.
Any advice on getting a pet pig? Just be sure you get the pig of the litter.
[Food Spread] This is the line of scrumptiousness.
What did the baby chicken say when he saw his mother sitting on an orange?
Dad, look what marma-laid!
What did Caesar say to Cleopatra?
"Toga-ther, we can rule the world!"
Why do dogs hate computers?
They can’t stick their heads out of those Windows.
How do you find Will Smith in the snow?
You look for Fresh Prints!
What did the tortilla chip say to the guacamole?
“You are all I avo wanted.”
I saw a fruit running from the police recently
It was a water felon.
I went to my backyard and saw a bird of prey eating avocado toast.
It was a millennial falcon.
I asked my son to go get me a phone book. He laughed, called me a dinosaur, and handed me his iPhone.
The spider is dead, the iPhone screen is cracked, and my son is furious!
Asked a pianist if he could play the Chick Pea Song.
He said, "Maybe. Can you hummus a few bars?"
Where was the first donut cooked?
In Greece.
What did Dead Viking say to Voluptuous Valkyrie?
Valhallo there.
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