I tried to warn my son about the dangers of Russian roulette...
It went in one ear and out the other.
How many ears does Spok have?
Three. The left ear, the right ear and The Final Frontier.
A captain was barking at his crew. "What do you think is between yer ears!?"
"Eye Eye, Captain!"
Son: Hey Dad, why do you have your ear right up to that computer?
Dad: I’m listening to A Dell
The other day someone made fun of my ears for hanging down too far.
Lobe low, dude.
After making love the other night, I told my spouse that I love when the whisper sweet things in my ear...
So my spouse leaned in close and whispered..."Syrup."
What do you call friends with airpods in their ears
Earbuds.
How much does it cost a pirate to get his ear pierced?
It's a buccaneer
Wind carried the sound of two people mocking each other to my ears.
I was in diss-gust.
My mate had an accident and lost his ear. The doctors were able to graft on a new one made of pig skin.
His hearing is now quite fine, but every now and then he gets some crackling.
My wife is always telling me I shouldn’t stick Q-tips so far in my ear
At least that’s what I think she was saying.
What kind of ears do trains have?
Engineers.
Me and my ears hate badminton so much
It's making a racket.
My father in law has had an ear infection for three weeks.
I had to double check that, it didn't sound right.
A doctor walked into an exam room to see a patient with carrots sticking out his ears and broccoli up his nose.
The doctor said: “I can tell right away that you haven't been eating properly."
Why can’t your ear be 12 inches long?
Because then it would be a foot.
A man goes to the doctors and says " Doc, I'm having problems with my ears, I think I'm going deaf".
The Doc says " Can you tell me the symptoms?"
The man replies, " Well, Homer's the big fat bloke, and Marge has blue hair!"
Why are super loud sounds bad for your ears?
It hertz your eardrums.
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