Why are boy keyboards scared of girl keyboards?
They don't want to get qwerties.
When my father complained to my mother for never picking or dropping me at school, she looked at him and said, "You are the master of drag and drop, my love". He's an IT specialist...
I now pronounce you husband and wifi
You may kiss the bride goodbye.
I for one
is something you might do if you had a broken keyboard
Playing the keyboard is...
my type of music.
Where do computers go to dance?
The disk-O.
Dear keyboard manufacturers, I'm writing to request a redesign so that g and t wouldn't be right next to each other. Retards
How do you type the word "Royalty" on a keyboard?
You start with the higher R key.
My doctor must think I have a bad hard drive
He said he needed to C:
What's one of the worst things you could come across while surfing the web?
Your keyboard.
It's okay password...
...I'm insecure too...
I heard that starting next year, keyboards will no longer be sold with italics...
But it was a bold-faced lie.
Why did the PowerPoint presentation cross the road?
To get to the other slide.
Q. How does a tree get on the computer?
A. It logs on!
I was at a funeral & asked the priest for the WiFi password
"Have some respect for the dead!" he said
I replied "Is that all lower case?"
Asked the librarian rather loudly for the wifi password. He said "Sshhhhhh!" I asked "is that all lower case?"
Why was the IT guy in the hospital?
He touched the firewall.
Why was the hard drive scared of the large file?
Because it was a terror-byte.
How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
None because it's a hardware issue.
Where are dead computer hackers buried?
In decrypt.
Q. What's a computer geek's favourite snack?
A. Microchips.
My wifi password is the cat's birthday month
Feb-paw-hairy
Q. What did the computer say to the cookie?
A. "Can I have your chocolate chip?"
I just lost a key on my keyboard
Now its all out of control.
Today my "O" button on my keyboard stopped working.
Maybe it was a sign I should've stopped o-ppressing the keyboard.
In an attempt to deter computer hackers I've changed all my passwords to 'Brazil Nut'
That will be a hard one to crack.
I got a asked to leave karaoke night for singing "Danger Zone" seven times in a row. I had exceeded the allowed number of Loggins attempts.
I left my job at the keyboard factory today. To be honest, I had been looking for an Escape for a while.
The computer said my password needed at least eight characters and at least one number, so I changed it to Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.
I had no one to help me when my computer and phone mutinied
I was left to my own devices.
Why did the computer parts salesman quit?
He lost his drive.
How do lumberjacks shut down their computers?.
They log off.
Got fired from my job at the keyboard factory. I couldn't keep the space clean.
So I was in the library when this cute girl came up and asked to borrow my external hard drive
It was at this point I realized she wanted the (D:)
I asked the bartender for the WiFi password but he told me to buy a drink first. So I ordered a Moscow Mule and asked him again. He handed me a card with the password. It said:
"Buy a drink first" ... no spaces, all lowercase."
My computer is so slow it's running in the '90s.
Why did the computer come with airbags?
In case it crashed.
IF YOU GUYS SEE A LINK ON FACEBOOK THAT SAYS "GET A MILLION DOLLARS FOR FREE" DON'T CLICK ON IT.
IT IS A VIRUS THAT PUTS YOUR PHONE'S KEYBOARD ON CAPS LOCK.
I hate hard drives...
...they byte
How many wipes does it take to clean a keyboard?
qwsedrftgyhujikolpawesdrtfgyhujikloaszxdcrfvgtbhnjmk,lazsxdcfvgsedtfrgyftg67y78u87u8uii9op[;'';;'/;l/l;.l.k,lkmjkmertyudfghjk12q21q2qw3qwe3we4r45rt6ygerdgfvbwedfcv qwedfscv
What do computers do on a beach vacation?
Surf the net.
Why did Karen press Ctrl-Shift-Esc on her keyboard?
Because she wanted to speak to the Task Manager!
Do you know the band 1023 megabytes?
They haven't had a gig yet.
I dropped my computer on my foot.
It mega-hurts.
What was Hitler's favorite computer game?
Mein Kraft.
Up until now, I always thought that all the cool mice would get together and live in my mousepad. Now when I know the truth, I feel quite broken.
What happened to the plane run by a computer?
It crashed.
Apparently my password needs to be capitals only so I've changed it to LONDONMADRIDROME.
People need to be careful about computers at all times because they byte.
What did the eyewitness tell the cops after a computer robbed a bank?
It went data way!
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