When it started raining, I spotted a potato across the road pretty fast and I wondered what’s up? It wasn’t long before I saw a fork up ahead.
We’re a perfect mash.
Why was the sweet potato too shy to ask out the russet potato? Because he was a real spud.
What do potatoes become when they smoke weed?
Baked potatoes.
Happy Birthday to my best spud….get it? ? Spud…bud? ?
Where does a potato go to college? DeFry
Who is a potato’s favorite author? Edgar Allen Poe-tato.
What do you call a lazy spud? A couch potato.
What do you get when it rains potatoes? Spuddles.
Who is the most powerful potato? Darth Tater.
Did you hear about the potato that got its head chopped off? It was decap-potatoed.
What do you say to an angry 300-pound baked potato? Anything, just butter him up.
What’s a potato’s favorite TV program? Starch Trek.
Why was the potato put in an asylum? It was starch raving mad.
Why do potatoes make good detectives? Because they keep their eyes peeled.
Boil ’em, mash ’em, stick ’em in a stew. Happy Birthday from me to you!
A potato gave a gift to his girlfriend.She said, “Aww, why are you so sweet? ”He said, “It’s just the
way I yam.”
What do you call a potato wearing glasses? A spec-tater!
What do you call a potato that has turned to the dark side? Vader tots!
Why don't potatoes go to parties?
They're scared of the Monster Mash.
What do you get when if you cross a potato and the terminator?
A termitator.
The sweet potato asked the other potato : “How are my eyes? ”
What is a potato’s life philosophy? I think, therefore I yam.
How does a potato win at Street Fighter? By mashing the kick button.
What do you call a spinning potato? A rotate-o.
Time fries when you’re having fun!
I like you a latke!
What’s a potato’s least favorite dance? The Mash Potato.
You’re the tater to my tot. I miss you a lot!
Potato puns are a-peeling.
Tony, where do I even starch? I yam so happy we’re best spuds!
All potato puns are pomme de terrible.
Why didn’t the mother potato want her daughter to marry the famous newscaster? Because he was a common-tater.
When potato chips don’t sell fast enough, the maker knows it will soon be crunch time.
“How was your day? ” “It was tater-ible”
If we played hot potato I’d lose, because I’d never let you go.
I love you a tot!
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
If you’re looking for potato puns, you can count on me to chip in.
What do you call a baby potato? Tater tots!
Everything in this world is either a potato or not a potato
What do you call a potato at a football game? A spec-tater.
Why did the potato wear socks?
To keep his pota-toes warm.