Who is the most powerful potato? Darth Tater.
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
What kind of potato do you want to take home to your parents? A sweet potato.
What do you call a potato at a football game? A spec-tater.
People order potatoes a lot because they look a-peeling on the menu.
I yam rooting for you my sweet potato and I won't mash your heart
If we played hot potato I’d lose, because I’d never let you go.
How do you know when a potato is in a bad mood? When they are acting salty
Why was the potato put in an asylum? It was starch raving mad.
When potato chips don’t sell fast enough, the maker knows it will soon be crunch time.
Did you hear about the potato that got its head chopped off? It was decap-potatoed.
What is a potato’s life philosophy? I think, therefore I yam.
Time fries when you’re having fun!
I miss you! I’ll see you tater!
Why was the sweet potato too shy to ask out the russet potato? Because he was a real spud.
What do you say to an angry 300-pound baked potato? Anything, just butter him up.
Why wouldn’t the reporter leave the mashed potatoes alone? He desperately wanted a scoop.
What do you call an everyday potato? A commentater!
What do you get when if you cross a potato and the terminator?
A termitator.
What do you call a potato that smokes weed? A baked potato.
I love you a tot!
What do you call a baby potato? Tater tots!
I met a girl that owned three french-fry factories. I was impressed but to her it was just small potatoes.
What kind of potatoes are in the best shape? Hash browns; they’re totally shredded!
What do you call a potato wearing glasses? A spec-tater!
Boil ’em, mash ’em, stick ’em in a stew. Happy Birthday from me to you!
Happy Birthday to my best spud….get it? ? Spud…bud? ?
All potato puns are pomme de terrible.
What do you call a lazy spud? A couch potato.
“How are you? ” “Well, I yam fried”
What’s a potato’s favorite TV program? Starch Trek.
Why did the potato wear socks?
To keep his pota-toes warm.
What do you get when it rains potatoes? Spuddles.
Where does a potato go to college? DeFry
Potatoes have skin. I have skin. Ergo, I am a potato
What did the daddy potato say to his son before his soccer game? I’m rooting for you!
“We are experiencing slight tuber-lence on the flight”
Have a s-mash-ing birthday!
We’re a perfect mash.
What do you call a baby potato? Small fry.
When it started raining, I spotted a potato across the road pretty fast and I wondered what’s up? It wasn’t long before I saw a fork up ahead.
Potato puns are a-peeling.
How do you know when a potato is high? When it looks baked!
John, you have so much po(tato)tential!
You’re the tater to my tot. I miss you a lot!
Thanks to you, I’m saddled with unnecessary peelings.
Say this aloud: Eye Yam Stew Peed
Potatoes that are medi-tators maintain calm and peace even when uprooted.
What’s a potatoes favorite horror movie? The Silence of the Yams.
“I can’t breathe” One potato said to the other. “What happened? ” The other said. The potato replied “I
feel I dropped my nose somewhere”