Which nut is the worst for your diet?
Donuts.
How does Bob Marley like his donuts?
Wi’ jam in.
What happened to the renegade donuts?
They went down in a glaze of glory.
What is a donut’s favorite day of the week?
Fry-day.
What do you see when the Pillsbury Doughboy bends over? Doughnuts!
Why did the donut go to a therapist?
He felt empty inside.
I’m opening a grocery store that specializes in Swiss cheese and donuts.
I’m calling it Hole Foods.
Why couldn’t the donut reach enlightenment? Because it was already holy.
I allow myself only one donut per year.
This morning I had 433 B.C., 1731, and 1952.
What do you call it when you order the same donut every day?
A do-rut!
Why do donuts make terrible teachers?
They’re always glazing over the important stuff.
What did Yoda say when he turned a patron away for ordering a pie?
“Dough. Or doughnut. There is no pie.”
Why do golfers love donuts?
Always a hole-in-one!
What kind of donuts can fly?
The plain ones.
What’s the best thing to put in a donut?
Your teeth.
What do donuts think about donut puns? They donut like them!
What are strange donuts made out of?
Weird-doughs.
Where’s a donut’s favorite vacation spot?
The Sahara dessert!
What’s the National Donut Day theme song?
“Donut Stop Believing.”
What do you call a cute donut?
A-dough-able.
What do you get when you cross Frosty with a baker?
Frosty the Dough-Man!
Why did the croissants take the donuts and bagels to Disneyland?
They thought it would be fun for the hole family.
The arrogant baker declared, “You’ll never hear a complaint about my doughnuts outside this shop window.”
The customer agreed, “It must be the double glazing.”
Why did the donut go to the dentist? It needed a filling!"
A cream-filled donut and an eclair decided to get a divorce.
It’s a sad story, but the real victims are their children. They’re in for a grueling custardy battle.
Where was the first donut cooked?
In Greece.