Local glass blower inhaled whilst working. He ended up with a pane in his stomach.
Turned down an opportunity to invest in a company making frosted glass balls. Couldn’t see any future in it.
How do you make garlic toast? Lift your glass and talk about the wonderful things it has done.
They’ve started a collection to open a pool near me. I gave them a glass of water.
What do you call a cat sitting on a platter?
A Platterpuss.
A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer and the sizzlin' steak platter.
"Here's your steak," the bartender says. "Be careful, that plate is really hot."
"Oh, no worries," the guy replies. "I'm not really attracted to plates."
Justice is a dish best served cold
Because otherwise it would be justwater.
What is the national dish of Sweden?
Swedish.
What is the dish that likes using the light switch?
StrogONOFF
What do you call it when you have to quickly eat a beef dish wrapped in pastry crust?
A brief Wellington
What did the plate say to the refrigerator?
"Stay cool. Dinner's on me"
Is plate throwing a trully Olympic sport?
Discuss.
Cops should feed beans on very tiny plates to the suspects they're interrogating.
That way they're always gonna end up spilling the beans.
Minding my own business, when someone I thought was my friend threw a serving plate full of bumblebees at me.
I was bee-trayed.
Got emotional hearing about the role of tectonic plates in earthquakes. It was really moving.
My biggest problem with having three square meals a day is that all my plates are round.
Was arguing with a friend in a restaurant recently when the waiter ran over and took the plate of garlic bread and the coleslaw. I wish he’d stop taking sides.
A plate of sandwiches walks into a bar. The barman says “we don’t serve food”.
Almost dropped a plate of Alphabeti Spaghetti. That could have spelled disaster.
I said to her, are going to eat that whole plate of spaghetti??
She said: no, it's in pasta bowl
My wife has this weird OCD where she arranges the dinner plates by the year they were bought.
It is an extremely rare dish order.