I’m soy
into you.
How do you get a teddy bear across the border?
You snuggle it across.
"I wood never leaf you."
What did the fruit lover say after he met a girl?
I’ve got a date
Its ok to kiss a nun....
But don't get into the habit.
I don’t know about you, but I think helicopter rescue pilots have the best pick-up lines.
What do you get if your lovers soul was trapped in a sword for all eternity?
A babe-blade.
I always find artists romantic because when they love you, they do it with all their art.
If you were a triangle, you’d be acute one.
I’m o-fish-ally in love with you.
Never laugh at your spouse’s choice… You’re one of them.
"Did you hear how the baker proposed to his girlfriend?"
"Yeah, he told her he loafed her more than life itself"
"No, he actually told her how much he kneaded her"
What did the lipstick say after he let down his friend?
I’ll make it up to you.
I whale always love you.
Being uncomfortable with any physical contact, I decided to rent the book “How to Hug” from the library.
Turns out it was Volume 6 of an old encyclopedia.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Olive.
Olive who?
Olive you! and I want the whole world to know it.
What shape is a kiss?
A-lip-tickle.
What is it called when two spies hug?
A bond-ing moment.
"Yoda one for me."
What sound do hedgehogs make when they kiss?
Ouch
You are in my heart, my mind, and in my entire body.
In fact, my doctor says that you must be a parasite!
Are you a beaver? ‘Cause dam.
My little girl just asked for a goodnight kiss on her nose....
I said I can't kiss that thing it smells!
Why were the melon lovers sad?
Because they cantaloupe.
My gay lover asked me if date night was optional.
I said no, it's a mandate
What do you get when you kiss a diseased bird?
Cherpies, but don't worry.
It's tweetable.
What do you call someone that's hungry for some cuddles?
Hugry.
You’re turtle-ly awesome.
Sloths never kiss on the first date, they take it slow.
You’re my #1 pick.
What is the cutest car?
A BM-cuddle-U
When girls say they want a guy who can sweep them off their feet...
they do know that there’s a janitor ready for the job, right?
I took a road trip with my girlfriend who finally confessed she needs to stop and hug every now and again to reduce anxiety.
It was touch and go from there on.
Let’s spend some koala-ty time together.
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