I cannot espresso
how much you mean to me.
I'm reading a romance book in Braille.
I don't think I'll finish. It's too touchy feely for me.
I always have a souper time with you.
When girls say they want a guy who can sweep them off their feet...
they do know that there’s a janitor ready for the job, right?
Let’s spend some koala-ty time together.
You are like my dentures.
I cannot smile without you.
You met all of my koala-fications
My little girl just asked for a goodnight kiss on her nose....
I said I can't kiss that thing it smells!
"I'm nuts about you."
Why are volcanos so nice?
They lava you.
How did the telephone propose to his girl?
Duh, ain’t it obvious? He gave her a ring!
What do you say when you find the perfect font?
You’re just my type!
What did one boat say to the other boat?
Are you interested in a little row-mance?
Life without you would be un-bear-able.
How long have I loved you? I’ve lost track.
What did one leaf say to the other leaf?
I’ve fallen for you.
If you were a triangle, you’d be acute one.
I have bean thinking about you.
You’re my #1 pick.
What do German meat lovers breathe?
Hamburg-air
I like you sow much.
"Did you hear how the baker proposed to his girlfriend?"
"Yeah, he told her he loafed her more than life itself"
"No, he actually told her how much he kneaded her"
I have bean
thinking about you.
I like to crouch down, hug my knees and lean forward.
That's just how I roll
Its ok to kiss a nun....
But don't get into the habit.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Olive.
Olive, who?
Olive you, and I don’t care who knows it!
I love you with all my butt.
I would say my heart, but it is just not as big. (wink wink where my curvy booties at?!)
I’m soy
into you.
How do you kiss someone at the end of the world?
On the apoca-lips.
What do you get if your lovers soul was trapped in a sword for all eternity?
A babe-blade.
My wife and were on the sofa and I lean in for a cuddle.
She says: "careful I'm holding a tea!"
And I say: "and I'm holding you, so I guess we're both holding letters of the alphabet"
What did the astronaut’s fiancé say when he proposed to her in open outer space? She said, “I can’t breathe!”
Why shouldn't you kiss anyone on January 1st?
Because it's only the first date
What do you call someone that's hungry for some cuddles?
Hugry.
How do you get a teddy bear across the border?
You snuggle it across.
I took a road trip with my girlfriend who finally confessed she needs to stop and hug every now and again to reduce anxiety.
It was touch and go from there on.
My counselor gave me a hug today
I guess I got shrinkwrapped
"I lava you."
I’m o-fish-ally in love with you.
My son fell asleep last night with the TV clicker in his hand.
He’s really embraced remote learning.
Did you hear Harry’s girlfriend left him for Keith?
Yeah, she was always telling the poor guy to Harry up, turns out she found someone who could Keith better.
Why is it so hard for people with asthma to have exciting dates?
The last thing you want is someone to take your breath away!
I get a real kick out of you.
You’re udder-ly perfect.
From one vegan to another – I think you’re fern-tastic, and I’ll never leaf you baby.
Are you a beaver? ‘Cause dam.
I don’t know about you, but I think helicopter rescue pilots have the best pick-up lines.
If you get married out on sea or in a boat...
is that a row-mance?
What did one sushi roll say to the other sushi roll?
I’m soy into you.
You are the coffee to my espresso and I love you a latte.
I whale-y like you.
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