What did the fruit lover say after he met a girl?
I’ve got a date
Sloths never kiss on the first date, they take it slow.
You’re right up my alley.
What do you get if your lovers soul was trapped in a sword for all eternity?
A babe-blade.
How did the telephone propose to his girl?
Duh, ain’t it obvious? He gave her a ring!
Why is it so hard for people with asthma to have exciting dates?
The last thing you want is someone to take your breath away!
Which sea creature gives the best hugs?
A cuttlefish
What did the salad lover say to his girlfriend?
You will Romaine in my heart forever ?
We bee-long together.
Do you have a date for Valentine’s Day?
Yes, it is February 14th
What did the lipstick say after he let down his friend?
I’ll make it up to you.
What did the patient with the broken leg say to their doctor?
Hey doc, I have a crutch on you.
If you were a triangle, you’d be acute one.
If you really want to get a date at a restaurant, it’s always nice to cut to the cheese.
I like to crouch down, hug my knees and lean forward.
That's just how I roll
I’ll always be running-back to you.
You’re udder-ly perfect.
You must be copper and terillium because you are Cu-Te
Being in love is a lot like central heating in your home.
You turn it on just before your guests come over and pretend that your house is always like this.
I think you’re incredi-bowl.
When a gardener asks you how much you love them, you could try the effective – I love you from my head to-ma-toes.
I always have a ball with you.
Why are volcanos so nice?
They lava you.
My gay lover asked me if date night was optional.
I said no, it's a mandate
My son fell asleep last night with the TV clicker in his hand.
He’s really embraced remote learning.
I cannot espresso
how much you mean to me.
What do you get when you kiss a diseased bird?
Cherpies, but don't worry.
It's tweetable.
I used to love puns about throwing things, but now I don’t.
It was just a fling.
I started dating her when she backed her car into mine at the mall.
I guess you could say we totally met by accident.
How do flowers kiss?
With their tulips
What do German meat lovers breathe?
Hamburg-air
My little girl just asked for a goodnight kiss on her nose....
I said I can't kiss that thing it smells!
"You bake me crazy."
The cat’s out of the bag – I love you purry much.
What did the grilled cheese say to the frying pan?
You make me melt.
I love you deerly.
Why did Paco's girlfriend not want to kiss him?
She was afraid of the a-Paco-lips.
You are like my asthma.
You just take my breath away.
You make miso happy.
I whale-y like you.
Why do painters always fall for their models?
Because they love them with all of their art.
What is a dairy product like as a partner?
They’re your butter half.
Wow, wouldn’t mind if you became my significant otter.
I love spending koala-ty time with you.
What's the deal with people who refuse to embrace technology?
Answers on a postcard please.
We make a great pear
What do you call a person who illegally delivers hugs from country to country?
An international snuggler
You will always have
a pizza of my heart.
I don’t know about you, but I think helicopter rescue pilots have the best pick-up lines.
What sound do hedgehogs make when they kiss?
Ouch