How did the telephone propose to his girl?
Duh, ain’t it obvious? He gave her a ring!
If you were a triangle, you’d be acute one.
You are just like my car because you drive me crazy.
You’re udder-ly perfect.
I’ll always be running-back to you.
What did the lipstick say after he let down his friend?
I’ll make it up to you.
I like you sow much.
I pitcher us together forever.
I’m soy
into you.
"Yoda one for me."
You octopi my thoughts.
What did the astronaut’s fiancé say when he proposed to her in open outer space? She said, “I can’t breathe!”
Or maybe it’s baseball players because they’re so great at hitting it off.
Last winter was so cold, I couldn’t stop telling my wife how much I glove her.
What shape is a kiss?
A-lip-tickle.
"I wood never leaf you."
How do you kiss someone at the end of the world?
On the apoca-lips.
You’re right up my alley.
What sound do hedgehogs make when they kiss?
Ouch
Are you a beaver? ‘Cause dam.
Why is it so hard for people with asthma to have exciting dates?
The last thing you want is someone to take your breath away!
What is a dairy product like as a partner?
They’re your butter half.
My counselor gave me a hug today
I guess I got shrinkwrapped
If you really want to get a date at a restaurant, it’s always nice to cut to the cheese.
What’s it like to kiss a vampire?
A real pain in the neck!
When girls say they want a guy who can sweep them off their feet...
they do know that there’s a janitor ready for the job, right?
I have bean
thinking about you.
What is a cat lover's favourite tree?
A juni-purr.
What do you call a person who illegally delivers hugs from country to country?
An international snuggler
We make a great pear
Why did Paco's girlfriend not want to kiss him?
She was afraid of the a-Paco-lips.
Your love is like vodka.
You were worth the chase.
I feel thankful for having you as my gym buddy and lover.
Our relationship is really working out.
You are like my asthma.
You just take my breath away.
From one vegan to another – I think you’re fern-tastic, and I’ll never leaf you baby.
You are in my heart, my mind, and in my entire body.
In fact, my doctor says that you must be a parasite!
I started dating her when she backed her car into mine at the mall.
I guess you could say we totally met by accident.
I always find artists romantic because when they love you, they do it with all their art.
I get a real kick out of you.
What did the bowl of soup write on their Valentine?
I love you pho real.
What did one sushi roll say to the other sushi roll?
I’m soy into you.
Sloths never kiss on the first date, they take it slow.
I love spending koala-ty time with you.
You met all of my koala-fications
Why did Larry the lizard leave his lover longing?
he had ... a reptile dysfunction
Why did the skeleton need a hug?
Because he had nobody.
What did the salad lover say to his girlfriend?
You will Romaine in my heart forever ?
I told my wife to embrace her mistakes
So she gave me a hug!!!
Why do accountants make good lovers?
They're great with figures.
If you get married out on sea or in a boat...
is that a row-mance?
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