What do you do when you are in the wrong seat?
Stand corrected
How many drum sets can you store on a sofa?
One per cushion
My friend was bragging about his new L-shaped sofa, so I told him I had one too.
It's just lowercase.
I stole two sofas from death, but I wasn’t ready for the reaper cushions.
What does a couch say to another couch at the other side of the room?
We are sofa apart!
What happens when you make love on a couch?
It becomes a sectional.
I think a couch can endure many things, but if you take off its cushions, it would make it uncomfortable.
I'm studying the meaning of couches in different parts of the world.
It's really PhillySOFAcal.
I'm moving some couches today...
Sofa, so good!
What’s Irish and stays outside all year?
Patty O’Furniture
Why is IKEA the cheapest place to get furniture?
Because they have some Swede deals!
How do you get more bounce in a water bed?
Put some spring water in it
Why doesn't james bond fart in bed?
Because it'll blow his cover
I said to my doctor, "I usually sit on the computer 12 hours a day...is that bad?"
He replied, "That can't be too comfortable. Try a chair!"
Someone took my three-legged chair.
I guess it was stoolen
I'm never sure if I like rocking chairs or not.
I go back and forth on them
I've come up with a list of the top 10 types of specialized chairs.
Number 3 will shock you
My husband hated my impulse purchase of a revolving chair, but then he sat on it.
Eventually he came around.
What do you call a chair in a suit?
A tuxSEATo
My chair is missing an arm and a leg.
That doesn't sit well with me.
My office chair broke. It’s letting me down.
What do you call an artistic piece of furniture?
A drawer
What’s the healthiest piece of furniture?
The vege-table
What’s a farmer’s favorite piece of furniture?
a COWch.
How do you move a piece of furniture at the weather station?
With four casters.
I think i spent way too much on this table. It is just not a foldable.
It was my first attempt at repairing my wobbly picnic table.
I totally nailed it.
Which noble man loves sitting at a round table?
Sir Cumference
The salesman at the furniture store told me "This sofa will seat 5 people without any problems!"
To which I said, “Where on earth am I going to find 5 people without any problems?”
Do you think anyone will buy the new furniture made by Apple?
iWood
I thought I won the argument with my wife as to how to arrange the dining room furniture... But when I got home, the tables were turned
My wife said we needed to have a serious talk about my obsession with furniture.
I said we could table it for now.
There's a group of guys that assemble wooden furniture for fun.
I hope they let me join.
What do you call a furniture store that is over 30 miles away?
The Sofa-r store
I know a good joke about Ikea furniture, but I'm still putting it together.
How is a shoddy furniture manufacturer like a bag of prunes?
They both create loose stools.
I stubbed my toe onto a piece of furniture. C-ouch!
I love my furniture... Me and my recliner go way back.
I couldn't chair less!
Nothing really mattress.