What do you call a very slow skier?
A slope-poke.
Why did Comic Sans divorce Times New Roman? He just wasn’t her type.
What do you call a truck towing a smaller truck?
A mother trucker
What happened when the semi-colon broke grammar laws?
He was given two consecutive sentences.
What did Prince leave on the neck of his guitar?
Finger prince.
When my father complained to my mother for never picking or dropping me at school, she looked at him and said, "You are the master of drag and drop, my love". He's an IT specialist...
Why didn’t the newlyweds plant any flowers this spring?
They were too busy planting kisses!
Gobbling gorgoyles gobbled gobbling goblins.
What’s every ice cream parlor owner’s side hustle?
Sundae school teacher.
Do you know what kind of stock to use when making neotropical near-passerine bird soup?
Doesnt matter, as long as you put Toucans in.
What did Van Gogh name the ear he didn't cut off?
Van Stay.
How to cars convince you?
By telling you that ‘you Audi-believe it.’
Q. What is a gorilla's favorite movie?
A. Planet of the Apes.
What's the best Beatles' song to play at a coffee shop? Latte Be.
I’m kind of a big dill.
Is it true that a dinosaur won't attack if you hold a tree branch? That depends on how fast you carry it!
What do dinosaurs put on their pizza? Tomato-saurus
When we spill soup on the comic book, we will get soup-erman.
I’m sure my wife has been putting glue on my weapons collection.
She denies it, but I’m sticking to my guns.
What do you call a crocodile that keeps breaking the law?
A crookadile.
I heard the history teacher got into a fight with the math teacher
He did a real good number in him.
What’s a racehorse’s favorite clothing brand? Jockey.
What cookie makes you rich? A fortune cookie!
Why do birds fly south in the fall?
Because it’s too far to walk.
What bird is blue and is great at taking a bath?
A scrub jay!
Why was the bouncy castle so expensive? Due to the cost of inflation.
If you are wondering about the most important constitutional right of a peach citizen, well, it's none other than freedom of peach.
What cheese do you use to get a bear out of a tree?
Camembert.
What would the pharaoh say after seeing the pyramid? He would name it mummy's home.
What did one cheese say to the other during philosophy class?
“I dis a brie.”
There’s a new movie out called “The Truck.” I’ve seen the trailer, it looks great.
Why is the giant afraid of Jack?
Because Jack's beanstalking him.
Why do wine lovers guzzle down vine humor?
Because wine jokes are a barrel of laughs.
What is a sharks favorite kinda sandwich?
Peanut butter and jellyfish!
I hate when my heater says something that sounds meaningful...
But it turns out to just be blowing hot air.
Last night I dreamt I was swimming in a sea of oranges. I guess it was just a Fanta-sea!
I was waiting at the hotel's lobby when the WiFi was disconnecting from time to time.
I really hated that reception.
My local ice cream man was found dead in his garage covered in strawberry sauce and hundreds and thousands.
Police believe he topped himself.
I told the artist that his painting was terrible. I think he got the picture.
The last time I wanted to go bowling, all the pins were on strike. So I just stayed at home and watched TV instead.
If Jim has 15 watermelons and throws one at Mary, what does Mary have?
“A really bad headache!”
Why couldn’t the angle get a loan?
His parents wouldn’t Cosine.
My partner got mad when she found so much spam on my computer.
She said, "Food belongs on a plate!"
Where do ski instructors keep their money?
In the local snow bank.
Do truckers prefer houses with long-haul ways?
What do Ents wear to the beach?
Sandalwood.
What do they use to get a tan?
Palm oil.
What happened when Dr. Frankenstein swallowed some uranium?
He got atomic ache.
My TV hates the outside world.
Whenever it faces outside it just glares.
What is a cheese lover’s favorite musician?
Mozart-arella.
Do hairless goats wish they had mohair?
Go to BabaMail
