WOOD you tell give some wood puns?
That romantic cow took his new girlfriend to the moo-vies.
Why can't Vikings fans eat cereal? Because they choke before they ever reach the bowl.
What problem do you encounter with twin witches?
You can never tell which is witch.
Why are rabbits so lucky? They have four rabbit’s feet.
Yesterday I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I'm OK, but I feel like I've dyed a little inside.
When the bread started crying because it was toast, the loaf told him, "You deserve butter."
How many cookies could a good cook cook If a good cook could cook cookies? A good cook could cook as much cookies as a good cook who could cook cookies.
Of all the best pieces of wolf advice, this is my favorite, “stand fur what you believe”
What is a cat’s favorite book? The Princess and the Paw-per.
Why do the French eat snails? They dislike fast food.
What did the dog say when he had a bad day?
Today has been ruff.
Away from their official duties, soccer players love dancing at a soccer ball.
Why do they put fences around graveyards? Because people are dying to get in!
Did you hear about the cat who drank ten bowls of water? It set a new lap record
Four types of weather were having a race. Sunny won gold, cloudy got silver, snowy picked up a bronze, and rainy won a precipitation award.
What happened when a man practiced archery near some stationary planes? They ended up very arrow-dynamic.
What do you call a room full of crows? Crowded.
I'm burning a gold-scented candle.
It has a very rich aroma.
Why did the turtle cross the road?
To get to the Shell station.
When doesn’t a bull have horns?
When it’s a bullfrog.
I wanted to do some research on organs in biology, but I had no WiFi and couldn't find the information I wanted.
I wound up using cellular.
I hate it when the grammar Nazis single me out.
It seems like a which hunt.
What is a bat’s favorite dessert?
Pineapple upside-down cake.
What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
Anybody can roast beef!
If H20 is in the inside of a fire hydrant, what's on the outside ?
K9P.
A baker fell down the stairs with a platter full of cookies.
As they say, that's the way the cookies crumbled.
I watched, horrified as two trucks carrying cheese crashed into each other. De brie was all over the road.
What did the guest say when he arrived at the peanut butter’s dinner party?
“Nice spread!”
How do you catch a unique tiger?
Unique up on it.
How do you catch a tame tiger?
Tame way.
Where do cats go when they lose their tail? A re-tail store!
What do you call a thirsty camel ?
A dry humper.
What's the deal with people who refuse to embrace technology?
Answers on a postcard please.
What do you call an existential lycanthrope?
A whywolf.
How are bad school grades like a shipwreck in the Arctic Ocean? They're both below C level!
Why do horses make good lawyers?
Attention to de-tail.
How do werewolves eat lunch?
They wolf it down.
You don't know jack-o-lantern
Basketball is the only sport where the basket is filled but never gets full.
When someone accidentally stepped on his foot, the wolf screamed, Aoooowwwww!
It is not really much about how you bowl, but instead how you roll.
What is the difference between lightning and electricity. For electricity, you need to pay, but
lightning kills for free.”
Yesterday I put a $50 note in my freezer.
Now I have some frozen assets.
A mime in our town was arrested yesterday after he got into a bar fight and broke his left arm.
He still has the right to remain silent.
What did the pun mom say to the new pun dad?
We have a pun in the oven!
What do you get when you cross a pig with a centipede?
Bacon and Legs.
Where is a frog's favorite place to eat?
At IHOP.
What was Valentine’s favorite dessert for the French cat?
Chocolate mousse
Green is the most relaxed color in the rainbow, it's so jade back.
This hottie has forever changed the film industry, and it starts with the letter P and ends with 'orn'. Reel your mind back in - we're talking popcorn!
Go to BabaMail
