What is a monkey's favorite cookie? Chocolate chimp!
Why are there so many ruts in the ice at the rink?
The maintenance crew must be slipping up.
Do you want to hear a pizza joke? Never mind it's too cheesy.
When I was a kid, my mother told me I could be anyone I wanted to be.
Turns out identity theft is a crime
What did they Turkey say to the blade of grass? Nice knawing you!
Who said that the pyramids are the tallest structure in Egypt? They are just between pyra-highs and pyra-lows.
Making puns ha?
Toucan play that game.
What does a cheese lover say when someone keeps messing around with them?
“You gouda brie kidding!”
If you coriander into my tomato soup, you will give me a soup-herb dish.
What is a frustrated mother’s favorite month?
I SAID NO-vember.
What penalty in hockey uses the most amount of energy? A power play.”
Why do witches not wear a regular hat?
Because there's no point in it.
What do you call an imaginary color?
A pigment of your imagination.
Where’s the best beach to buy sports gear at?
Jersey Shore.
Why are shovels, trowels, and spades so common in down-to-earth novels and movies?
Because they're plot devices.
Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers. How many pickled peppers did Peter Piper pick?
Why is the left cerebral cortex always wrong?
Because it was never in the rgiht.
How did Poseidon greet the sea monster?
- Hey buddy, what's kraken?
What do you call a white crow?
A caw-casian.
My computer wants to build a snowman.
It's frozen.
Two flies were fighting on a toilet seat.
One got pissed.
Why was the piglet whining.
He was boared out of his brains.
I read a bunch of news articles dealing with lightning strikes recently.
I'm trying to keep myself knowledgeable about current events.
What do turtles do when one of them has a birthday?
They have a shell-ebration.
What is it called when you're singing in the shower and shampoo gets in your mouth?
A soap opera.
What is a Leatherback Sea Turtles favorite sandwich?
Peanut butter and jellyfish.
Even the heaviest chandelier is pretty light.
What did one horse say to the other after he said he wanted to drop out?
That’s an equestionable decision.
Why does Venus have a crush on the sun?
Because the sun is really hot.
A mosquito asks for a date: "I'd like to take you out to suck blood on someones leg"
She says "I don't know, I feel like I'm going out on a limb here."
A dragon would never explode
But a dino might.
What bug has 100 legs and lives by the outhouse?
Scenta-Peed.
Why was the bucket so embarrassed at the beach?
Because of how pail it was.
Why did the old woman fall into the well?
Because she couldn’t see that well.
Where do phones like to travel?
To the Great Call of China!
What are ants made of?
Antimatter.
What eats nuts and bolts?
A squirrel that’s running late.
When an unripe strawberry saw the ripe strawberry, it went green with envy.
The guy who invented the watch must have had a lot of time on his hands
I've decided to marry a pencil.
I can't wait to introduce my parents to my bride 2B!
There are lots of funny jokes about mushrooms that can give you stitches. However, you need to be patient enough because they need time to grow on you.
Q: What did the old orange see before it died?
A: The grim ripe-r.
Why did the owl invite his friends over?
He didn't want to be owl by himself.
Recently, i started learning Spanish
But i can't hola long conversation.
Why do tigers always hunt and eat their prey raw?
Because they don’t know how to cook it.
What do ghouls and goblins put on their nachos?
Ghost peppers.
A friend asked what an acorn is. I said, “In a nutshell, it’s an oak tree.”
What did one ornament say to another? I like hanging with you.
The head surgeon shouted at me for accidentally severing the patient's spine.
I think I struck a nerve.
The innocent blueberry got easily framed for the crime because the evidence was a strawberry plant.
Go to BabaMail
