I forgot my fork so tried to eat my lunch with just a spoon. It was pointless.
I've decided to stop being a fork and become a spoon.
I just woke up one day and didn't see the point anymore.
I watched an eclipse through my colander, now I’ve strained my eyes.
Did you know cutlery scams require the most patience?
You've got to play the long prong.
Why can't you use a wooden spoon in a Teflon pan?
Because its non stick.
I ate a spoon of food color...
Now i'm dying inside.
My wife was scratching the glass jar with a metal spoon...
It was jarring!!!
How do you call a straw used for drinking orangeade?
Fantastick.
What do Santa’s elves cook with in the kitchen?
A u-tinsel.
Why did the fork feel kinky near the spoon?
Because it was a tease spoon.
"This is the last straw!"
I shouted to my wife as I put it in my drink...
A kitchen knife and fork had a race. Who won? Neither, it ended in a drawer.
I always remember to eat my soup with a spoon.
It’s un-fork-edible.
My friend showed me how he keeps his expensive butcher knife sharp.
I thought it was pretty cleaver.
I downloaded a colander app instead of a calendar and now my battery keeps draining.
A tuning fork is, essentially, a pitch fork.
How did the cutlery greet the steak?
Knife to meat you!
I'm going around with a bent knife, so that when I'm short on time, I can cut corners.
I found a cutlery dispenser that doesn’t work properly
No forks were given.
I used to work at a cutlery store, but I quit
No more Mr. Knife guy.
How do you call clothings for spoons?
Silverwear
I was walking home last night through the park, when this scary looking kid drew a knife on me...
The little brat used a permanent marker and it was a bastard to wash it off.
why did the spoon show up dressed as a knife ?
Invitation said to look sharp.
Did you hear about the journalist who became a sterling silver spoon salesman?
He finally found the scoop he was looking for.
Why didn’t the cheese want to get sliced?
It had grater plans.
When my doc said that my kitchenware diet was bad for my bowels, I crapped my pans.
When I was a student, I was worried that my housemates would be annoyed if I ran off with some of their kitchen utemsils. But that was a whisk I was willing to take.
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