I’ve been experimenting with attaching various kitchen utensils to my power drill
I got mixed results.
A kitchen knife and fork had a race. Who won? Neither, it ended in a drawer.
Where do you bury dead cutlery?
In it's final resting plates.
Someone took all my straw
What a Hay-nous act!
When you lick the icing off a spoon are you defrosting it?
Why was the cheese happy in the kitchen?
He thought he was grater than everyone else.
A tuning fork is, essentially, a pitch fork.
My friend showed me how he keeps his expensive butcher knife sharp.
I thought it was pretty cleaver.
What do you call a bad cheese grater?
A cheese lesser.
Why can't we make jokes about the cutlery incident?
It's too spoon.
I went into the kitchen and found that someone replaced all the cutting utensils with spoons
That wasn't knife.
A piece of cheese sees his cheese friend looking a little disheveled. “Are you OK?” he asks.
“I’ve felt grater”, his friend coughed.
Do you know why the boy didn't want to become a cheese slicer like his brother?
He wanted to become a grater man.
I was on the road yesterday with my metal detector looking for some cutlery....
I found plenty of spoons and knives but I didn't stop, until I hit a fork in the road.
Why did the female chef win the cook-off?
Because cheese grater!
Had to my dinner with just a knife and spoon last night...
It wasn't easy, but that's a fork-gone conclusion.
Who will lead the army of drawing utensils?
The ruler.
How do you make cheese even better?
You use a cheese grater of course!
I bought a complete set of kitchen utensils off an infomercial. I was frustrated that there was nothing to mix my eggs...
...but to be fair, they did say it was whisk-free offer.
One of my kitchen utensils seems to be playing classical music.
Think it’s the Chopin board.
So my brother is grating cheese for a dip. He looks up and says,
"I'm the gratest."
How do Chinese people make cutlery?
They chopsticks.
Did you hear about the new WiFi connected chef's knife?
It's cutting-edge technology.
I watched an eclipse through my colander, now I’ve strained my eyes.
I'm going around with a bent knife, so that when I'm short on time, I can cut corners.
Don't use raw milk to make butter
It's not worth the whisk.
When I was a student, I was worried that my housemates would be annoyed if I ran off with some of their kitchen utemsils. But that was a whisk I was willing to take.
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