Did you hear about the fruit who was convicted of armed robbery?
“Now he’s a waterfelon.”
Did you hear the one about the watermelon pirate who went to the Caribbean? Must have desperately wanted to catch some arrgh and arrgh.
What do you get when you divide the circumference of a watermelon by it’s diameter? Watermelon PI.
If that’s the case, would it be wrong to say that the unfaithful watermelon had an illegitimate daughtermelon?
The watermelon plant didn’t like sharing a garden with passion vines; but they started to grow on him.
I think it’s funny when I ask girls whether they would spit or swallow my seed if I was a watermelon. Unfortunately, almost all of them reply not in a hundred melon years.
What do you call a watermelon that spends all day at the beauty spa? Must be a hottermmelon.
What do you calla watermelon that just won’t stop committing crimes? A watefelon.
How are a car and a bicycle similar?
“You can’t make watermelon juice out of either of them.”
The watermelon thief was charged with robbery with violence, but the judge later changed that to a minor felony; or melony as he put it.
So, what do you do with an epileptic watermelon? Simple, you make a seizure salad.
What do you call a melon that commits a crime?
“A water-fellon!”
They asked how the watermelon farmer felt after winning the lottery; clever bugger said he felt like a melon bucks.
Even though Jake was a heartthrob Casanova, he just had to break up with his long-time watermelon vending girlfriend; said she was always melondramatic about everything.
I hear Jake finally broke up with his crazy grocer girlfriend; never could tell water problem was.
You know what they say about when life gives you melons?
You might be dyslexic.
Why did one melon break up with the other melon?
“He didn’t know water problem was.”
What do you call a serial killer watermelon? A slaughter melon.
What did the watermelon wife say to his stinky husband? You’ve got a strange smelon you today.