Why do pumpkins never quarrel? Because they have no stomach for fighting.
My son just tried to tell me a joke about pumpkins.
Oh, gourd, was it awful.
I'm the pun King of Halloween.
What's black, white, orange, and waddles? A penguin carrying a Jack-o-lantern.
I went to the backyard this morning and saw a bird of prey drinking a pumpkin spice latte.
It was a millennial falcon.
Why couldnt the pumpkin have kids?
He had a halloweener.
My friend wanted me to take care of his extremely fragile pumpkin.
I told him I'd gourd it with my life.
What did the perverted pumpkin use for his pick-up line?
Hey gourd-geous! Wanna go back to my place and squash?
When it comes to seasonal drinks, more and more are converting to the church of pumpkin spice,
but I choose to remain eggnogstic.
What do you get if you cross a pumpkin with a bigfoot?
A Sasquash.
What do you call a pumpkin that can slam dunk a basketball?
Michael Gourdan.
Pumpkin Spice season is finally here, better latte than never.
What was the pumpkin's favorite sport?
Squash.
What do you get if you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter?
Pumpkin Pi.