What did one hummus say to the other hummus
“Sabra.”
My Ex Girlfriend stole my Hummus.
I told that chick, peace
I'm going to start a hummus brand that comes in really difficult to open containers.
It's gonna be called 'hummus posta eat this'.
My girlfriend spilt hummus all over her...
Can't believe that chick pea'd herself.
I asked the pianist if he could play the Chick Pea Song.
He said, "Maybe. Can you hummus a few bars?'
Predictive Text
It's the scurge of the hummus rice.
What's the difference between Hummus and Humus?
"mmmm"
I can't get my wife to try Mediterranean food.
She doesn't like hummus, which is a naan-starter.
Where did Vegans come from?
Hummus Sapiens
Due to unusually successful harvests of chickpeas this year, the price of hummus is going to fall dramatically.
Buy the dip.
What did the hummus say to the pita bread when he got sick?
I falafel.
I saw a road sign the other day that said "Dip In Road"
I turned the corner and drove straight into a load of hummus
I fed my wife some ground chick peas and she choked to death
The police are treating it as a hummuside.
Ugh.. I ate too much hummus..
And now I filafel.
What did the fans say to the band named after a famous chickpea spread?
Hummus a tune.
Man wins award after he died eating appetizers at a Mediterranean restaurant
It was a Post-Hummus award.
I was gonna make a joke about Mediterranean food...
But hummus have missed the mark, and now I falafel.
What do a pregnancy test and hummus have in common?
They both require a chickpea.
What is the correct answer to Hummus?
A cow.
Did you get a side of hummus?
It's a hummuside.
I've been on a real hummus kick lately, so as I came home from work tonight, my sister says to me "You're always bringing home hummus now." To which I replied, "Hummus where the heart is!"
Me: I think I'll take a dip in the pool.
Lifeguard: What ya got there?
Me: Hummus.
So I was standing in the grocery store comparing the prices of a couple packs of hummus when my roommate came up to me and suggest the off brand roasted red pepper kind to which I replied:
"Ya, I'm not really sure about that brand. They seem to be very hit and hummus for me."
He was not impressed.
Grandma: Do you like Hummus? Me: I love Hummus....and I sometimes like to singus!
Why did the hummus blush?
Because it saw a chickpea!
What is the charge for beating someone with a bottle of olive oil and a can of chick peas ?
Attempted Hummus-ide.