I was walking past the store today when I saw a sign saying, "All items one-third off."
So I bought a dozen eggs. Unfortunately four of them were rotten.
I went to the store today and bought some really oddly shaped eggs.
Now I can't find them. I think they've been mislaid.
How can you drop an egg six feet without breaking it?
By dropping it seven feet. It won’t break for the first six.
What's an egg's favorite tree?
A y-oak tree.
What kind of eggs does a confused chicken lay?
Scrambled eggs.
What does a meditating egg say?
Ohmmmmmmmlet.
What do you call a self-obsessed egg?
An eggomaniac.
Why did the hen lay her egg on the axe?
She wanted to hatchet.
How many French eggs do you need?
One egg is un oeuf.
How did the egg get up the hill?
It scrambled up.
Because the platypus both lays eggs and produces milk,
It is one of the few animals that can make its own custard.
What did the egg say to the clown?
You crack me up.
Why did the egg go to school?
To get egg-ucated.
Why do hens lay eggs?
Because if they dropped them, they'd break.
Why can't you tease egg whites?
Because they can't take a yolk.
I was visiting my dear old Grandpa the other day when he said to me, "Let me give you a bit of advice. You can't make an omelette..."
"Without breaking eggs?" I finished for him.
"No. You can't make an omelette," he said, as he scraped it into the bin.
What did Snow White call her chicken?
Egg White.
What day to eggs hate the most?
Fry-day.
If you can't beat them...
Just have your eggs fried.
How do monsters like their eggs?
Terri-fried.
My son's asked for a strange Christmas present this year. It's really cheap though so I don't mind.
I'm not sure why he wants an eggs box though.
Eggs are going up again.
That'll surprise a few chickens.
Where do eggs go on holiday?
New Yolk.
I never count my chickens before they're hatched.
Because they're eggs.
What did the egg do when it saw the frying pan?
It scrambled.