What does a meditating egg say?
Ohmmmmmmmlet.
Why did the one legged clown leave the cheese circus? Because he couldn't get his stilton.
When the little boy was baking a cake why did it run away? Because it said crack 2 eggs then beat it!
What do you call a self-obsessed egg?
An eggomaniac.
What's an egg's favorite movie?
Over Easy Rider.
A man walks into a bar with a fried egg on his head.
The bartender asks, "Why have you got a fried egg on your head?"
The man replies, "Because boiled eggs fall off."
How did the egg get up the hill?
It scrambled up.
What do you call someone who eats too many eggs?
An egg-oholic.
How do monsters like their eggs?
Terri-fried.
I went to the store today and bought some really oddly shaped eggs.
Now I can't find them. I think they've been mislaid.
What do you get if a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn?
An eggroll.
Who wrote the book "Great Egg-spectations"?
Charles Chickens.
How can you drop an egg six feet without breaking it?
By dropping it seven feet. It won’t break for the first six.
I was visiting my dear old Grandpa the other day when he said to me, "Let me give you a bit of advice. You can't make an omelette..."
"Without breaking eggs?" I finished for him.
"No. You can't make an omelette," he said, as he scraped it into the bin.
What did Snow White call her chicken?
Egg White.
Because the platypus both lays eggs and produces milk,
It is one of the few animals that can make its own custard.
When I was younger, I once smashed up a nest of heron's eggs.
No egrets.
My son's asked for a strange Christmas present this year. It's really cheap though so I don't mind.
I'm not sure why he wants an eggs box though.
I saw an egg behaving oddly today.
It was probably just a bit egg-centric.
What crime is an egg most afraid of?
Poaching.
Where do Eskimos keep their eggs?
In the egg-loo.
What kind of eggs does a confused chicken lay?
Scrambled eggs.
How does a hen leave its house?
Through the eggs-it.
Why can't you tease egg whites?
Because they can't take a yolk.
My son's has never really had much of an appetite.
But suddenly today he's eaten a dozen Kinder eggs whole.
He's full of surprises.