Why can't you tease egg whites?
Because they can't take a yolk.
Why is the chef so mean?
He beats the eggs.
Where do Eskimos keep their eggs?
In the egg-loo.
How do eggs get around?
On a s-egg-way.
How does a hen leave its house?
Through the eggs-it.
What do you call a self-obsessed egg?
An eggomaniac.
If you can't beat them...
Just have your eggs fried.
Because the platypus both lays eggs and produces milk,
It is one of the few animals that can make its own custard.
What sport are eggs best at?
Running.
A man walks into a bar with a fried egg on his head.
The bartender asks, "Why have you got a fried egg on your head?"
The man replies, "Because boiled eggs fall off."
What did the egg do when it saw the frying pan?
It scrambled.
My son's asked for a strange Christmas present this year. It's really cheap though so I don't mind.
I'm not sure why he wants an eggs box though.
Eggs are going up again.
That'll surprise a few chickens.
What's an egg's favorite movie?
Over Easy Rider.
What's a hen's favorite shipping company?
Federal Egg-spress.
When I was younger, I once smashed up a nest of heron's eggs.
No egrets.
I was walking past the store today when I saw a sign saying, "All items one-third off."
So I bought a dozen eggs. Unfortunately four of them were rotten.
I saw an egg behaving oddly today.
It was probably just a bit egg-centric.
I steal my eggs from my next door neighbor.
I prefer them poached.
What did Snow White call her chicken?
Egg White.
Why did the hen lay her egg on the axe?
She wanted to hatchet.
It's my first day on the fishing boat and everyone keeps asking if I've found my sea legs.
I'm not falling for it though. I know for a fact that seals don't lay eggs.
I was going to tell you a joke about an egg but it's not all it's cracked up to be.
What's an egg's favorite tree?
A y-oak tree.
I saw a sign earlier that said, "Free Range Eggs."
I've never heard of Range Eggs before but at least they were free so I took some.