How did the avocado feel after a day at the gym?
Hard core.
How do little avocados get what they want?
They spread it on thick.
What do you call it when someone hits avocados repeatedly with a hammer?
Gu-whack-a-mole-e.
What did the Mexican heavy metal guitarist say to his bandmates?
“Rock out with your guac out.”
Can I have your last avocado?
Avocadon’t you dare.
What do you call people avoiding healthy fats?
Avocadonts.
How do you say “four avocados” in Spanish?
Um, avo-cuatro?
What did the waitress say to the customer who wanted free guacamole?
“You can kiss my Hass.“