What all kinds of stars wear the sunglasses? The movie stars.
What makes politicians and planets similar?
They both take up space.
What do you call an overweight alien?
An extra cholesterol.
Why doesn’t the sun go to college? Because it has a million degrees!
I could have been an astronaut...
but my parents told me the sky was the limit.
Why did you guys not laugh at my space puns? Because there way to Sirius.
I dare you to lie that you didn’t find all these space puns hilarious. Th
What is suns favorite chocolate bar?
A milky way.
Why does nobody invite Jupiter to the space parties? Because he has too much gas, always…
What is an astronauts favourite type of shirt?
Apollo
I've finally started to believe that Pluto is not really a planet...
Especially when I saw him in a cartoon.
What do you call a fashionable, but judgmental monster who howls at the moon?
A What Not To Wear-Wolf.
Scientists permit us to see the sun in different light.
What kind of light goes around the earth? A Satel-lite.
The sun replies: I hurt everyone when they come close to me.
Why does NASA give astronauts pencils to use in space?
Because they've got the Write Stuff.
What did Earth say to the other planets?
Wow you guys have no life.
Why don't aliens get hungry after being blasted into space?
Because they've just had a big launch.
I got an e-mail saying, "At Google Earth we can read maps backwards!" and I thought to myself...
“That’s just spam.”
What do you call an alien with three eyes?
An aliiien.
The sun is mad at the clouds because the clouds keep throwing shade.
People gave the sun a rating.
It was only one star.
Are Earth and Moon good friends? Yes, they’ve been going around together for many years now.
Scientists have found that the center of Jupiter… has the letter i.
What planet is next to Uranus?
Poopiter.
What spread do astronauts use on their toast?
. . . Space jam
What did Neil Armstrong say when people didn't laugh at his moon jokes?
"I guess you had to be there."
What will you do when you will see a spaceman? You will simply park your car, man!
An astronaut broke up with his girlfriend
Apparently he didn't love her to the moon and back.
What do you call the Earth when it is quaking?
Shakesphere.
Is that the Dog star? You can’t be Sirius!
Who is the first farmer to walk on the moon?
Neil Farmstrong.
Becoming a space pilot is not easy. It requires a good altitude.
What holds the moon up?
Moonbeams!
Why does no one trust the man on the moon?Why does no one trust the man on the moon?
Because he has a dark side!
How do you put a baby astronaut to sleep?
You rocket.
What kind of magazines would the planets prefer to read? Cosmos.
What do you call an alien spaceship that's leaking water?
A crying saucer.
What currency do astronauts use in space?
Starbucks.
Why does Moon goes to the bank? To change his quarters.
Where do the astronauts park their vehicles? At the parking meteors.
Sun to Earth, on the night of 31st December:
"Let's have another round, shall we?"
SpaceX is launching astronauts today with a new space catapult
Bringing forth a new era of crude spaceflight.
There’s a big thunderstorm. The road is blocked by a big mudslide. A little boy asks his dad, “Why does earth fall down like that?”
His dad answers, “It’s terrain.”
When astronauts die, the local papers run an orbituary.
My wife will never forget falling asleep in the sun with her breast exposed.
It’s forever burned in her mammary.
I telephoned the tennis star Serena Williams for an interview and asked her, “What’s your favourite planet?”
Her: It’s Venus.
Me: Sorry Venus, would you put Serena on the phone?
I was up all night wondering where the sun had gone for so long but then it finally dawned on me.
What time do spacemen get up? Alien in the morning.
Why haven't the aliens visited earth yet?
They read the reviews... only one star.
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