It peels nice to be voted in as the most appeeling model in the contest.
What do you call a pine-nut in an apple costume? A pine-apple.
What do you call it when there are two nuns in a drum circle?
a conundrum
Why couldn't Vivaldi play medieval music?
Because his violin was Baroque
What do skiers order at fast food restaurants?
Icebergers with Chilly Sauce, on the slide.
As autumn came, the leaves started greeting each other by saying, "Hay there!"
What did the blind man say after being handed a cheese grater? "That's the most violent book I've ever read."
I don't think I need a spine.
It's holding me back.
When we cross a deer and a mouse, what would we get?
“Mickey Moose!”
We pass expectations, set the standards and kill the competition. This is definitely one of the best volleyball puns to use as your team’s motto.
Q: What do you call a gust of wind that blows a tall guys onto a basketball court?
A: The NBA draft
What element comes from Norse mythology? Thorium.
Q: How do clouds keep in touch with each other?
A: Using sky-pe.
Do you always play this badly at the net? Because I don’t like your approach.
You’re the tater to my tot. I miss you a lot!
What do you call donating a chair?
Charity!
Why was the actress scared of the deer?
She had stag fright.
What do you call a famous inmate? A cellebrity.
Why did the pig break up with her boyfriend?
Because he was a boar.
I was driving through the safari park when my sat nav said “bear left”. It was clearly a zebra.
Birthday candles don’t exercise because they burn out too quickly!
The cookie monster couldn’t make his bed, why? Because he couldn’t find his cookie sheets.
What happened to the skier who was injured the the top of the peak?
It's been all downhill from there.
I just got an adorable baby goat, but it can’t bend its legs.
The vet said it’s a cute kid knee disorder.
Have you ever been to a marketplace in Egypt?
It's quite bazaar
What did Mars tell to Saturn? Give me a ring sometime!
Why can’t a Christmas tree sew? It keeps dropping its needles.
How does a Viking show the amount of raiding and pillaging that they do at the same time?
They use a Sven Diagram.
A female sheep and a couple of aggressive birds are sitting on the veranda. What language do they speak?
Porchewegeese.
What kind of day ends with no toilet paper?
A bidet.
Where is the Ghost’s bedroom located? Down the Hall-oween.
Did you hear about the guy who had an addiction to cheddar cheese?
It was only mild.
There is nothing impaws-sible if you’re as brave as a tiger!
Love is also like a pineapple: They both are undefinable and sweet.
How do you apologize to a koala?
Bear your heart and soul to them.
The scariest day of my life was when we ran into a bear taking a dump inside our campsite.
That sh** was in
Q. What did the bully do to the orange?
A. Beat him to a pulp.
I can't use my laptop anymore because someone spilled apple juice on it.
It was a cider attack.
What do you call a bee that makes a milk?
Boo-bee
A little girl is having a tea party with her teddy bear.
"Would you like anything to eat Mr. Bear?" she asks.
"No thanks, I'm stuffed."
What is the difference between a fish and a piano?
You can’t tuna fish.
What did the cake say to start the fight with the fork?
You want a piece of me?
German Wi-Fi is the WURST.
Why do golfers hate cake?
Because they might get a slice.
What's green and got two wheels?
A motorpickle.
What do you call two spine bones that are friends?
Vertebros.
Say it ain’t snow.
When one is Russian for industrialization, there is no time for Stalin.
Why are spiders such great volleyball players? Because they have an amazing topspin.
Why is Jupiter so sad and heartbroken? Because his crush wants a plutonic relationship with him.
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