2 years ago, the doctor told me I was losing my hearing.
Haven't heard from him since then.
Once there was a doctor who got shot. He adamantly wanted to perform surgery on himself, despite all of the other surgeons saying that he shouldn't.
But he was so insistent that they finally said "Fine, suture self."
Why was the doctor so paranoid?
He worked in the ICU.
Who is the coolest Doctor in the hospital?
The hip Doctor!
Who is the second coolest man in hospital?
The hip replacement guy!
"Doctor, there's a patient on line 1 that says he's invisible."
"Tell him I can't see him right now."
I dated a doctor once. Big mistake.
She was a Psycho.
Doctor 1: what’s his body temperature?
Doctor 2: it’s 90 degrees.
Doctor 1: What?! That’s can’t be right!
Doctor 2: No, it is.
There’s a new drama featuring herbivore doctors.
It’s called Graze Anatomy.
What do you call a doctor who became a delivery driver?
MedEx
Doctor, I keep peeing my pants! What can I do?
Urologist: “It’s mind over matter, urine control.”
My doctor told me that his job is easy because he can heal all of his patients with trigonometry.
He has a sinecure.
I went to see my Doctor this morning and told him "The tablets you gave me to stop me shrinking aren't working".
He said, “You'll just have to be a little patient then”.
Patient: ‘Doctor, I’ve swallowed a spoon.’
Doctor: ‘Sit down and don’t stir.’
My doctor told me that I needed I kidney
I told her no. I'd prefer an adult-knee.
Why did the house go to the doctor?
It was having window panes.
Earlier, I tried to sneak into the Star Trek convention disguised as the starship's doctor.
Security soon discoverd, however, I wasn't the real McCoy.
I ride share to work regularly, but if I'm in the backseat when we go through a tunnel I have a massive anxiety attack.
My doctor diagnosed me with Carpool Tunnel Syndrome.
A doctor tells a woman she can no longer touch anything alcoholic.
She got a divorce the next day.
When I woke up from my accident, I was shocked when the doctors told me I broke all my fingers.
It was hard to grasp.
"Doctor Doctor I feel like a supermarket"
How long have you been feeling like this?
"Since I was Lidl."