A security guard at an airport informs the pilot of a man trying to sneak contraband onto an airplane.
The pilot responds, "That's not going to fly."
Windmills? I’m a huge fan!
What did the beach say to the water? "I need some vitamin sea."
What happened to the plane run by a computer?
It crashed.
The best place to hide something is at an airport
You'd be hiding something in plane site.
My grandad was responsible for 28 downed german planes in WW2.
Still to this day, he holds the record as the worst mechanic the Luftwaffe ever had.
Some airplanes are so cramped that at the end of the trip, you suffer jet leg.
What do you call a paper plane that doesn't fly ?
Stationary.
I used to be addicted to time travel,
but that's all in the past now.
I think there'll be a ferry-tale ending to this trip.
This palace is a breath of fresh heir!
A ship wanted to travel from the Pacific to the Arctic
But it just couldn't get its Bering Strait.
Cows that travel alone?
Never herd of them!
My dad thought Cuba would be boring. He's now Havana a really great time.
The airline lost my luggage, and so I sued them. Unfortunately, I lost the case.
How do rabbits travel?
On hareplanes!
When you cross a magician and an airplane, the result is a flying sorcerer.
Will invisible airplanes ever be a thing?
I just can't see them taking off.
If you travel to the future and get decapitated
You'd be ahead of your time
I sued the airport authorities because they misplaced my belongings
I lost the case
I just flew on a plane with an all female flight crew.
It was an....unmanned aircraft.
Airlines have nowadays become so cash strapped that they charge you for everything including emotional baggage.
My son asked me how often planes crash
Usually just once
Los Angeles International Airport should sell their own brand of laxatives called LAXatives.
I've just arrived in Bulgaria. How is it? Sofia, so good.
I was so tired. I needed a sea-esta on the beach.
I am lucky to live in an airport, but whenever the guard comes out at night, Heathrows me out.
Flying for long distances is very Boeing at times
Long ago, a couple of dudes claimed that human flight was possible.
They were Wright.
What travels all over the world, but stays in a corner?
A stamp
I hate getting tide down in one place. So let's take an ad-van-ture.
As soon as the plane was invented, things started looking up.
We've been driving all day, I need a brake.
My suitcase started crying when I picked it up. I was carrying emotional baggage.
It's a-boat time we took a vacation!
One of my friends got lost while touring Tokyo. Turns out it was all Ja-plan.
I wouldn't say that flying is my favorite way to travel...
But it's up there.
Volcanoes are rude! They are always int-erupt-ing.
No one can accuse this trip of being plane.
Took a flight, and my luggage got torn to pieces....
My lawyer said I don't have much of a case.
Prague is my number one choice for a dream destination...
Dying to Czech it out
Every single person on my flight was reading at the same time.
The plane was fully booked.
People who fall sick at the airport possibly end up with terminal illness.
Pilots would be very hard to beat in a competition, they are always ready for a-rrival.
Loving this road trip, but all this driving is tire-ing!
I've got this awful disease where I can't stop telling airport puns.
I think it may be terminal
In spite of all restrictions because of Covid, diplomats are allowed to travel freely across countries.
Because they have immunity.
It's lunchtime and the newcomer at my workplace is on a plane to India
Turns out, someone told him that the nearby Delhi has the best sandwiches
Why was the ocean angry? Because the ocean didn't wave back.
I met my wife at a travel agency
She was looking for a vacation and I was her last resort.
Where do sharks go when they want a vacation? Finland
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