Why did the monster eat the caboose? The locomotive told it to choo choo.
Got a couple of railway buffers going cheap. It was an end of line sale.
Why don’t elephants like to ride on trains? Because they hate leaving their trunks in the baggage car.
Why can’t the engineer be electrocuted? Because he’s not a conductor!
Why are ghosts no good at running a railway? A. Because they can’t even put on a skeleton service!
I miss the old days of railway when the engineer had plenty of esteem.
Got a couple of railway buffers going cheap. It was an end of line sale.
Where do crabs and lobsters catch their trains?
King's Crustation.
A friend of mine quit his job as a reporter and left town by railway. It was an ex-press train.
My boss said to me, “You are the worst train operator ever. How many trains have you derailed in the past year?”
I said, “I’m not sure. It’s so hard to keep track.”
I know someone who tried to run away after camouflaging a railway. He tried to cover his tracks.
What do you call a locomotive with a cold? A choo choo train.
New electric trains will run on conductors.
Why do you have to wait so long for a train on Halloween? They only run a skeleton service.
Did you hear about the train that dressed up for Halloween?
It became a fright train.
A friend got to the final of the local model railway competition. He lost on points.
How can you tell a train just went by? A. You can see it’s tracks!
I just quit my job as a train driver a few weeks ago.
I can't help but feel that my life has gone off the rails since.
What happened to the man that took the 5 o’clock train home? He had to give it back!
I know an elephant who refused to travel by train because he didn’t want to leave his trunk in the baggage car.
Why did the train have bubble gum? Because he wanted to go Choo Choo
If you walk along a railroad track you may soon feel run down.
How do you find a missing train? Follow the tracks
Went to a railway fancy dress party. Everyone was wearing platforms.
Did you hear about the man who sat next to his clone on the train?
He was beside himself.
What kind of a car does a crazy man drive? A LOCOmotive.
What do you give a train driver for Christmas? Platform shoes!
I was so embarrassed when my wife found me playing with my son’s train set that I threw a blanket over it.
I think I managed to cover my tracks.
Went to a railway fancy dress party. Everyone was wearing platforms.
I’ve always liked one-liners. That’s why I’m a fan of monorails.
What is as big as a steam locomotive, but weighs nothing? Its shadow.
Did you hear about the boy who had to do a project on trains? He had to keep track of everything!
Ticket inspectors. You’ve got to hand it to them…
What did the Mama Steam Engine say to her Baby Steam Engine at supper time? “Choo choo!”
The school teacher tells you to spit out your gum, while the locomotive says “Choo Choo Choo!”
I am on the train and a light just came on saying the toilet is engaged.
Congratulations, toilet!
What did Train say when they visited a sibling in South Korea?
Hey, Seoul Sister!
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