How do you put a baby astronaut to sleep?
You rocket.
What do you do when your friend is a claustrophobic astronaut?
You give him a little space.
My dads astronaut friend ate pizza in space
He said it was out of this world.
Do you know what is the favorite key of the astronauts?
The Spacebar.
What are the best kind of flowers to get your girlfriend after screwing up?
Whoopsie Daisies
Mountains aren't just funny.
They're hill areas.
"Hi, I'm Buzz Aldrin. Second person to step on the moon.
Neil before me."
What holds the moon up?
Moonbeams!
How does one astronaut on the moon tell another astronaut that he is sorry?
He apollo-gises.
Whats the first day of the week called in outer space?
Moonday.
Why does no one trust the man on the moon?Why does no one trust the man on the moon?
Because he has a dark side!
Got my friend an unnecessarily large rocket for bonfire night.
He's over the moon!He's over the moon!
What did Neil Armstrong say when people didn't laugh at his moon jokes?
"I guess you had to be there."
What do moon people do after they get married?What do moon people do after they get married?
Go on their honeyearth.
Mooning is very ASStrological
Who is the first farmer to walk on the moon?
Neil Farmstrong.
How does a quarter moon always feel?
Crestfallen.
Why is the moon a wanted criminal?
It’s constantly mooning people.
Living costs on the moon would probably be out of this world.
What kind of tropical fruit wants to visit the moon?
A Coco-naut
Do you know why no one has ever been sentenced for crimes committed on the moon?
Because it's a gray area.
Why did Neil Armstrong pee right after he made his first step on the moon?
He wanted to go where no man had gone before.
Why didnt the moon go outside?
Because it was waning.
The moon landing is obviously fake.
The moon is clearly still up there.
How does the sun say hi to the moon?
With a heat wave!
What do you call a meal from the moon?
A satellite dish.
Wanna know a way for werewolves to howl other than the full moon?
Make them stub their toe.
Libya changed its plain green flag to a crescent moon, but I think they'll change it back.
It's only a phase, after all.
What do you call a fashionable, but judgmental monster who howls at the moon?
A What Not To Wear-Wolf.
Why didnt the moon have any more to eat.
Becuase it was full
Canada is planning a mission to the moon
They're calling the spaceship the Apollo-G.
What do you call a person really crazy about the moon
A lunatic.
Can an Australian with poor vision clearly see the moon?
No, but a "good eye might."
Why does a Moon-rock taste better than an Earth-rock?
Because it's a little meteor.
Last night I was but by a bloodsucker from the moon.
Damn lunatics.
Why is the moon so conceited at times?
It becomes full of itself.
What do you think walking on the moon is like?
Not very impactful.
How does the moon cut his hair?
Eclipse it.
Did you hear about the restaurant they built on the moon?
The food is good but it lacks atmosphere.
What do you call an alien spaceship that's leaking water?
A crying saucer.
Where do aliens park their flying saucers?
At a parking meteor.
Why don't aliens get hungry after being blasted into space?
Because they've just had a big launch.
What is a lightyear?
The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
What's E.T. short for?
Because he's got little legs.
Have you heard the one about the spaceship that came to Earth?
Never mind its over your head.
What do aliens prefer to drink?
Gravi-tea.
How do you get a baby alien to sleep?
Rocket.
What do you call an overweight alien?
An extra cholesterol.
What do you call a wizard aboard a spacecraft?
A flying sorcerer.
How do you organise a welcome party for an alien race?
You planet.