I would have gone to space, but the cost is astronomical!
An astronaut who normally fails on a weightlessness experiment, might surely be aware of the gravity of the situation.
What are the best kind of flowers to get your girlfriend after screwing up?
Whoopsie Daisies
What do aliens prefer to drink?
Gravi-tea.
Where can you read about planets exploding?
In the orbituaries.
When astronauts die, the local papers run an orbituary.
Old astronomers got so tired of waiting for the sun to go down, that they decided to pack it up and call it a day.
I could have been an astronaut...
but my parents told me the sky was the limit.
Why does NASA give astronauts pencils to use in space?
Because they've got the Write Stuff.
Why should the Sun get into a school? To get brighter.
Why did the Sun never got into college? Because it already has quite a million degrees!
What do you call a fashionable, but judgmental monster who howls at the moon?
A What Not To Wear-Wolf.
"Dad, can you tell me what a solar eclipse is?"
"No sun."
Why haven't the aliens visited earth yet?
They read the reviews... only one star.
Which hot drinks space people like? Gravi-tea.
He knew literally everything about the constellations. Some might even say that his knowledge of the night sky was astronomical.
Beer is the greatest beverage on earth.
That's my pint of view, anyway.
What type of songs do planets sing?
Nep-Tunes.
Which candy do astronauts like? Marsbar.
What did Mars tell to Saturn? Give me a ring sometime!
The moon landing is obviously fake.
The moon is clearly still up there.
Wanna know a way for werewolves to howl other than the full moon?
Make them stub their toe.
How can astronauts get more protein in their diet? They make it meteor.
Have you heard the one about the spaceship that came to Earth?
Never mind its over your head.
What do the astronauts put on their lunch toast? Space jam.
Why does the earth appreciate the moon so much?
It keeps the oceans tidy.
SpaceX is launching astronauts today with a new space catapult
Bringing forth a new era of crude spaceflight.
Two astronauts who were dating, met up for a launch date.
Got my friend an unnecessarily large rocket for bonfire night.
He's over the moon!He's over the moon!
How will you save yourself if you come across an aggressive alien? Give him some space.
My wife will never forget falling asleep in the sun with her breast exposed.
It’s forever burned in her mammary.
What will you do when you will see a spaceman? You will simply park your car, man!
The sun replies: I hurt everyone when they come close to me.
Those who study the moon for their course or as a habit, are optimists. And that is because they look at the brighter side always.
Reading sun puns while sunbathing make one well red.
How did the astronaut die?
exposure to Mercury.
I've finally started to believe that Pluto is not really a planet...
Especially when I saw him in a cartoon.
What type of elements know everybody on earth?
Met-all.
I woke up this morning and forgot which side the sun rises from, then it dawned on me.
There's this vampire who's more powerful than any other, because he can't be hurt by the sun
All other vampires pale in comparison.
How do you organise a welcome party for an alien race?
You planet.
What time do spacemen get up? Alien in the morning.
How will you have communion in the space if you won’t have mass?
The satellite went into the orbit, right on January 1st, causing a New Year’s revolution.
Did you hear about the astronaut who stepped in gum?
He got stuck in Orbit.
The moon asked the sun: Buddy when you are so hot, why are you single yet?
Why is the moon so conceited at times?
It becomes full of itself.
Have you heard about the latest restaurant that opened up on moon?
No, how is that restaurant?
What is the best day to go to the beach? Sunday, of course!
What is an astronaut's favorite candy bar?
Milky way.
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